The Smart Ways to Save Money Fast (Even If You're a Big Spender)

Are you under the constant impression that you are barely making ends meet? It is almost impossible to treat yourself with something expensive, as you seem to have just enough money to get by through the month^[1].

Also, you have no major expenses on a daily basis, you pay the bills, you eat out maybe once or twice, and then you get your monthly subscriptions and maybe one or two new items. Yet, you still end up wondering where all your money went.

Furthermore, it has definitely occurred to you that you might need to get credit at some point, either for a new car or for an apartment, and that requires a positive credit history. All of these are valid and troublesome concerns, especially if you don’t have at least $1000 in your savings account.

So, here, we will go over how to increase your savings and become more prudent, as well as why saving money is tricky but necessary.

I got it, we save money today to prepare for a better future.

We are all fully aware of the reasons why it is important to save money. For starters, it is the first and most important step towards financial independence.

The second reason is that we need savings in the event things go south for some reason, or if we need money to buy or repair a piece of equipment that is necessary for our work or of us to earn money.

Lastly, you need to know how to properly manage your finances in order to have a positive credit score, which will make it easier for you to get a loan if you ever need one, and you will also have lower interest rates when returning that money.

But saving money always seems to be so difficult…

One of the main reasons why saving has become more difficult is due to micro transactions and monthly subscriptions.

If you want to save money, you need to give up a magnitude of smaller things rather than one or two of them. In other words, any attempt to save money by cancelling one subscription for example seems meaningless, since you aren’t saving a lot to begin with.

Another reason why we struggle with saving cash is because of our daily habits. We have developed certain tastes, and certain rituals that we tend to indulge on a daily basis, so very often, saving money warrants a fundamental change and people are not really fond of them in general.

Moreover, if you have a lot of bills that require immediate attention, it is difficult to think about saving money, when there are clearly more pressing matters.

So, spending money provides us with short-term positive feelings that we have kind of grown addicted to, whereas saving money does not. So, we are in a way stuck in this hedonistic treadmill ^[2], and we just continue to live on paycheck to paycheck.

What can I do to start saving money?

Now let us go over some of the techniques, habits, and tricks on how to start saving money on a monthly basis. If you somehow manage to adhere to all of these tips, you can look forward to a significant amount of cash. However, we are all aware just how difficult it can be to drastically change your life, so you can also introduce these new methods one at a time.

1. Say no to extended warranties.

Whenever we buy something we want to make sure that the item is high quality and that it will serve us for months or years to come. As a result, we are very often tempted to buy extended warranty, which is, in a way, a waste of cash.

First of all, if you are not particularly clumsy and if you do not cash in on your extended warranty, then there is no need to get one in the first place.

Second, we hate using the same thing for more than a year, so it is very likely that you will buy a new item or gadget even if the old one is still working.

2. Buy refurbished gadgets.

Here is a really good way to save a significant amount of money and get good products at the same time. We usually pay more for something just because it has a strong and well-known brand name behind it.

There is no reason to think of that as a bad choice; after all, a renowned brand means greater security, but it also means that it has good products in general.

In other words, buying branded refurbished gadgets can help you get amazing and useful tech without spending a fortune on it.

The downside of it is that you will not be up to date with the latest product, but eventually, they will be available as a refurbished phone or tablet, or any other gadget.

It is a good way to test yourself if you are buying out of peer pressure and to stay relevant, or if you are buying because you are acting on impulse.

3. Make it a weekly challenge.

A very useful trick for saving extra cash on a monthly basis is the so called weekly challenge. Much like with any game there are the easy, normal and hard mode, and this is how it is done. Basically, you set a weekly sum for yourself that you need to put aside at the end of the week.

You can go with $1, $5, or $10. The key is to double the amount at the end of the next week and so on until the end of the month. So with $5, you have $5 at the end of first week, $10 at the end of second one, $20 at the end of third and $40 at the end of the month.

This is why it is way more difficult to pull it off with $10 as your starting sum. It is a really good way of saving money, and you need to invest it with the rest of your savings into your savings account, in order to accumulate a more significant savings stash.

4. Train yourself to be more patient.

Patience is a virtue and for a good reason ^[3]. When it comes to saving money, you can save a lot if you are patient.

First of all, it gives you more time to research and discover better items at a more available price.

Second, you can wait until there is a sales incentive or discount at the store before you buy something expensive.

Third, many stores offer discounts if you purchase multiple products, so it is better to save money and then purchase in bulk because you are going to save more this way.

5. Save your spendings on transport.

We tend to spend a lot of cash on transport, whether we’re buying gas, or even worse, if we use a cab to get by.

If you make a deal with friends from work to car pool, you can reduce the carbon footprint by relying on one vehicle, and you can save money on gas.

If you spend too much money on taxis, then you should immediately switch to public transport. This is far more convenient and cheaper, plus when the traffic is busy, you will actually get to where you need to be more quickly.

Simply get a monthly pass, or store value on your metrocard to save more money and start walking a bit; it will do you good. Alternatively, you can buy a bicycle and use it to commute; it is also convenient, cheaper, and great for your health.

6. Cancel unnecessary subscription.

As mentioned, a great portion of our funds is funnelled away due to our monthly subscriptions that we do not even fully use. So, limit yourself to a single subscription that you are going to like the most during one particular month.

Private networks like hulu or Netflix usually announce what their users can expect in the upcoming month, so you can check that content in advance and decide which network you are going to use for that month.

7. Don’t pay for brand names.

We tend to pay a lot for big names and influential brands, and these products are usually overpriced for no reason. Sure, you might want a particular phone or PC to have strong components and, since it is a long term investment, you do not mind spending a bit extra.

However, when it comes to chargers, HDMI cables, headphones, or adapters, you can find decent products at a lower price that are going to get the job done. So, when you are buying something, it does not need to be from an expensive producer at all costs, and you can save a lot if you opt for less known, yet still competent providers.

8. Avoid eating out.

One way of committing financial suicide is by eating out frequently. Sure, we love the service, and that food is instantly prepared, but as mentioned, it is important that we practice patience in order for this to succeed.

It is far cheaper and healthier to prepare your own meals, plus you get to learn how to cook. ^[4]Today, we have pages and video clips that help us prepare meals, so there is really a small chance that you can mess it up, considering the amount of instructions you can get.

9. Consider energy saving appliances.

Finally, the money you save can be invested into energy conserving appliances and this helps you reduce the amount of money you pay for the bills. You can get energy saving light bulbs, as well as other appliances that spend less electricity, and you can even buy solar panels at one point.

Moreover, you can check your electricity provider to see how much they charge and switch to another one in your area that charges less.

Well these were the tips that can help you save money; you should also make sure to look up how to earn extra money online, just so that you create an even bigger savings account.

Some of these don’t require too much effort, others may include learning new skills, but mostly, it’s about practicing patience and restraint. Hopefully, you will find this article insightful and inspiring, and it will help you save some money.

Reference

[1]	^	Buzzfeed: 17 Confessions From People Who Struggle To Save Money
[2]	^	TheSimpleDollar: Running on the Hedonistic Treadmill
[3]	^	Lifehack: How to Practice Patience and Why Impatience Is Ruining Your Life
[4]	^	Buzzfeed: 26 Foods You Should Learn To Cook In Your Twenties

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It's Ok to Be Bored. You Don't Have to Be Busy All the Time.

It’s the same old scenario. You have a to-do list a mile long and no matter what you do, you can’t seem to tackle it. And you’re not alone.

Everywhere you turn, people are busy.

What happens when you call your family members? Busy.

When you call your friends? Busy. Or maybe you don’t call them because you’re busy.

People tend to take some sort of secret pride in “busy-ness.” But what’s wrong with NOT being busy?

Plan to be bored sometimes instead. Sound crazy? Well, actually being bored could be a good thing.

Why do people hate to be bored?

First, what exactly does it mean to be bored? Well, while boredom can mean many things to many people, the most basic of definitions is not being able to find an activity you enjoy — regardless of how much you want to. This is typically a result of routine. People are so used to going to their go-to method of entertainment, that when it’s out of reach — cell phones, tablets, watching tv, etc., — they feel boredom coming on. And they don’t like it.

Take a cue from a kid

You know why kids hate time out? Because they feel it’s boring! And the worse thing in life for a child is to be bored. But if you watch kids for a while, they’ll figure out how to entertain themselves just sitting in a corner. Magically, that string on their shirt becomes the greatest thing ever. Who knew?

As adults, wouldn’t you love a scheduled time out? What was a nightmare as a kid can be a dream come true for an adult. Taking the time NOT to think about the seven million things on your to-do list can actually do you some good.

Stop being busy and embrace boredom

Ever notice we are really “busy” but aren’t necessarily doing anything extremely productive.

We click, scroll, snap, like — you name it, and then get annoyed when half the day has gone by and that big project for work isn’t finished. Being “busy” and having constant distractions can really stifle imagination.

You know what happens when you put down the devices? You get creative, just like a kid. You tend to do things you wouldn’t normally do. That book that’s been collecting dust starts to look really good. Or you may not even have any physical books in the house, but you have butter, flour, baking powder, sugar, eggs, milk — let the baking begin! You may find that you’re a really good writer, artist, beaded-necklace maker and more.

Whatever the case, there’s something to be said about on-purpose boredom. Forcing the brain to work outside its comfort zone not only enhances creativity but can also improve problem-solving skills.

Boost your mood even when you are faced with boredom

Do you know you can actually find out how bored you are? Yes, there are online quizzes that actually help you determine your boredom. If you’re really that bored, pass some more time and take a quiz. But once you find out, then what? You will still be bored. And while being bored means you aren’t able to do the things you’d like to do, you will soon find out there are lots of other things you can do. Before you know it, you could increase productivity and even boost your mood.

• Get outside – Are you a slave to the latest technology? Unplug and get retro! Fly a kite, toss a frisbee or roller skate.
• Clean up – Stop tripping over that pile of shoes for the last time and take the time to get things cleaned up. While you may not want to do it, you’ll feel so much better once you’re done.
• Tackle a puzzle – You know you’ve been tempted to pull out the 1000-piece puzzle from the attic. Here’s your chance.
• Journal your thoughts – While it may be tempting to share what you ate on social media, take the time to journal your day.
• Enjoy your kids – For those of you with little ones, spend some quality time just watching them wobble to the door, pull your nose or learn peek-a-boo. You just can’t get that from a cell phone.
• Volunteer – Get your mind off your boredom and go help someone else. Your idle time can be life-changing for someone in need.
• Get some sleep – It’s amazing how much better you will sleep without all the distractions. You’re not doing anything else — go to bed early tonight!

So instead of being “on” all the time, let the mind take a break from the norm and enjoy a diversion from your typical means of entertainment. Explore being bored!

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Revealed: Successful Young Entrepreneurs' Secrets to Making Their Dreams Come True

Do you ever feel that you are investing in the dreams and success of others while neglecting your own? You punch a clock day in and day out, earn a meager pay-check for performing mundane tasks far beneath your capabilities, and for what–to help catapult someone else to success? If so, you are not alone. Many people are trapped in a cycle of chasing someone else’s dream for them, while theirs go unrealized.

Being an entrepreneur is the sexy new trend these days. Everyone seems to be doing it. What if you were to gain the necessary capital needed to launch your own business- would you? Or would the fear of failure stop you dead in your tracks?

If you chose to heed fear’s warning, you may be smarter than you think. Your fear is rational and not without merit. Building a startup is hard. That’s the tough reality despite all of the hype, glamour, and sexiness surrounding entrepreneurship. Statics show that over 90 percent of startups fail. ^[1] The odds are not in your favor.

10 young entrepreneurs show us how to achieve success

What about that small 10% who do manage to become successful? Their success is not accidental nor did it happen by chance. These young entrepreneurs prove that success is possible despite the odds. Everyone — from the young budding business person to the one looking to get out of debt — can learn something from these savvy upstarts.

1. William Zhou, Co-founder and CEO of Chalk.com

Lesson: Connect and care.

Chalk.com is described by Forbes as “Microsoft for teachers.” This education-based software company was birthed out of William’s desire to assist overworked, overburdened educators. His company has created software that simplifies lesson planning, assessments, and the evaluation process for teachers.

The lesson we can learn from William is that it is important to connect and care about your customer. His primary motivation for starting this company was to provide a service to help teachers and not just to earn a great pay check. He ended up doing both.

2. Brennen Byrne, Co-founder of Clef

Lesson: Keep the right people and stay away from the wrong ones.

Clef is a replacement for usernames and passwords. The technology works through phone cryptography, eliminating the need for passwords and making logging in quick and safe.

In an interview with AL.com,^[2], Brennen cites hiring good people as one of the most important aspects that helps perpetuate his company’s success. This lesson applies in life and especially in business. You must keep good people around you. Conversely, once you find that a person doesn’t fit the company character and vision, nix them quickly. You can’t afford to wait for a person to bloom, nor can you afford to keep an employee who doesn’t support your mission.

3. Adam Lipecz, Co-founder of Codie

Lesson: Focus on one idea at a time.

Codie is a toy robot and web app that introduces and teaches kids how to write code. In an interview with Forbes magazine, Adam describes Codie as being like Legos for architects.

Adam is an idealist. He has tons of great ideas all of the time. His success has come from learning how to focus on one big idea at a time and incorporate smaller ideas into the larger one. He is confident that he will create a ton of innovative gadgets because he has the discipline to throw all of his time, energy, expertise, and resources into each idea at the appropriate time.

4. Daniel Fine, Co-founder and CEO of Team Brotherly Love and The Fine Companies

Lesson: Passion and drive are essential to sustaining long-term success.

Daniel Fine is founder and CEO of Team Brotherly Love and The Fine Companies. These companies include a sunglass company — “Glass-U”, a medical app — “Dosed”, and a tutoring firm — “NexTutors.” Team Brotherly Love has raised over $2 million for Type-1 diabetes research. Glass-U makes fully-folding sunglasses and is licensed to hundreds of universities. It has been featured at events ranging from The Rose Bowl to Lollapalooza.

In an interview with the Huffington Post^[3], Daniel says that passion and focus are the two keys he attributes to his success.

“Those are probably the two most important things that if anybody has they’ll be able to achieve something. You need the passion and the drive in order to achieve something. Early on, you can create things without being incredibly passionate about it but you can’t consistently create things without being passionate about it. Focus is probably the next thing by a very, very close shot. The focus and drive overlap are two things that are just so necessary for you to be able to create what you’re shooting for. “

5. Sam Shames, Co-founder of Embr

Lesson: Your must work hard, but your work should capitalize on your strengths.

Sam Shames is not new to success. From his college days as a star wrestler at MIT to his inclusion as one of Forbes’ 30 under 30^[4] in 2015, Sam knows how to win. As a student at MIT, Sam engineered the core technology for his signature product: Wristify. Wristify is a wearable device that helps regulate temperature. It recreates the relief you feel when you warm your hands by the fireplace in the winter, or the cooling sensation you experience when you pour cold water over your head on a scorching summer’s day.

Sam believes that you should do what you love and it should be something for which you have a natural aptitude. He was built for everything he does. Sam believes in embracing and leveraging his unique set of skills, abilities, and aptitudes. He embraces hard work but believes that work shouldn’t go against your grain and should capitalize on your strengths.

6. Nanxi Liu, Co-founder and CEO of Enplug

Lesson: Go “all in” with your eyes wide open.

Enplug is technology that transforms any digital display (TVs, jumbotrons, billboards) from a static, one-way communication channel into an interactive and real-time display.

The entrepreneurial life is notoriously filled with risks, stresses, and sacrifices. Investing your life into a company at a young age is risky but the idea of taking risks is the fuel that propels successful entrepreneurs to keep moving forward. They don’t want, nor do they expect, failure but they understand it is a part of the process. To them, failure is a bump in the road- not the end of it. Expect it. Embrace it.

7. Becca Goldstein, Co-founder and COO of Fever Smart

Lesson: Always look to learn.

Fever Smart is a non-invasive, real-time temperature monitoring system. It is a preventative solution that enables users to head off potentially dangerous health issues through early detection.

Becca is a bit different from our other entrepreneurs. She wasn’t quite sure what she wanted to do with her life so instead of staying in college she took a year off to travel. Why? According to her, she knew she wouldn’t find the answer to the question, “Why am I here?” in a classroom. Becca, like most successful young entrepreneurs, will tell you that she doesn’t know everything but she is open to learning. Her secret to success? She is a true connoisseur of knowledge.

8. Gabe Blanchet, Co-founder and CEO of Grove

Lesson: Master the art of creating win-wins.

Grove is built on the belief that all people — regardless of location, climate or season — can grow their own healthy food right where they live. This business empowers people to actively participate in eating healthier while eliminating negative effects to the environment such as soil erosion and contamination of water runoff, and helps slow down the effects of climate change.

Gabe believes in having the best of both worlds. He and his partner are concerned with the state of the environment, mitigating hunger, and providing people with the technology that allows them to be proactive and productive in sustaining their health. They do all of this and they turn a tidy profit. He believes in helping mankind while building a powerful brand through savvy business processes. The takeaway from Gabe’s model is that your business should be a win-win.

9. Sarah Tulin, Co-founder and CEO of Oxie

Lesson: Don’t discount small ideas.

Oxie is an air purifier that you wear. It couples aerodynamic technology with a sleek design to protect users from air pollutants such as traffic smoke, pollen, and germs.

This genius idea was birthed after Sarah was assaulted by a huge cloud of bus smoke on her way to work one day. That one event has changed her life. She was able to combine her love and appreciation for fashion while simultaneously fulfilling a need. She believes that ideas — even the small ones — should be explored.

10. Caroline Pugh, Co-founder and COO of VirtualU

Lesson: Believe in yourself.

VirtualU integrates 3D human modeling technology with fitness and healthcare. It enables people to accurately track how their bodies change as they work out. It shows you exactly where you are losing weight and gaining muscle — in 3D! It also is being adapted to help people make more accurate selections when shopping for clothes online.

Caroline’s company’s mission is “to blur the lines between virtual space and reality to make the online experience as real as possible.” That is a pretty lofty goal, even for the most tech-savvy individual or company. Yet she states it with conviction and chases it with tenacity. Her mission statement truly is her mission and not just a group of words used to build a smoke screen brand. She believes in herself. She believes in her mission. She surrounds herself with those who believe in her and who push her to work harder and be better. Her belief in herself is what pushes her to keep going and makes the impossible plausible.

These are the secrets of ten young entrepreneurs who have beaten the odds. If you have ever felt that you are investing in the dreams and success of others instead of pursuing your own and you decide to start your own business, there is much to learn from these ten successes.

Reference

[1]	^	Forbes: 90% of Startups Fail. Here’s What You Need To Know About the 10%
[2]	^	AL.com: Meet Huntsville native Brennen Byrne, one of Forbes’ 12 most impressive young entrepreneurs
[3]	^	Huffington Post: Young & Entrepreneurial: How This Student Entrepreneur Started 4 Businesses & Partnered with the FIFA World Cup
[4]	^	Forbes: 2015 30 Under 30

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How to Deal with People Who Can't Stop Getting Attention

Have you noticed how some people always want to be the center of attention? Whether at work or play, they behave in a way that makes them stand out from the crowd.

You meet these people regularly. “Mr. Outrageous” dresses and acts in such an eccentric way that heads turn when he walks down the street. “Ms. Flirty” oozes appeal that men can’t resist. Even women take notice of the way she moves and her sultry voice. But wait. Are these normal levels of attention seeking or something more?

Attention seeking individuals may be suffering from “Histrionic Personality Disorder.”

Even though you’re sure to be familiar with people who crave attention, you may not be aware that they could be suffering from a mental illness known as Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD).^[1] The American Psychiatric Association defines HPD as a personality disorder characterized by excessive attention-seeking behaviors and emotions.^[2]

If the word “histrionic” is new to you, here’s how Merriam-Webster^[3] defines it: Deliberately affected, overly dramatic or emotional, theatrical.

Think of reality TV participants. Frequently they display the traits listed above. In most cases it’s obvious that the participants are huge attention seekers.

How to Identify People with Histrionic Personality Disorder

Let’s now look at how to quickly spot people with HPD. They’re likely to display some or all of the symptoms below:

• Intense, unstable emotions
• Inappropriately flirtatious or seductive behavior
• Constant need for reassurance and approval
• Easily bored by routine
• Overly concerned with physical appearance
• Problems maintaining relationships
• Uncomfortable in situations where they fail to be the center of attention

It’s important to be clear that we can all suffer from the above symptoms from time to time. However, individuals suffering from HPD are prone to exhibiting the symptoms incessantly.

The Cause of Histrionic Personality Disorder

Mental health studies have revealed some of the likely causes of HPD:

• Brain wiring response to early developmental trauma caused by neglect
• Genetical inheritance
• Environmental factors such as lack of criticism while growing up

Why Recognizing Histrionic Personality Disorder Is Important

Whether they are colleagues, friends, or loved ones, it’s critical that you recognize someone suffering from HPD. In doing so you’ll be able to help your relationship with them – making both your lives happier.

As an example, let’s imagine that your boss suffers from HPD. He or she has terrible mood swings and the annoying trait of making small errors on your part seem like major disasters. They also lack the ability to focus on their daily duties, so often hand over their work for you to handle. If you didn’t know that he or she suffered from HPD you’d likely be driven crazy by your boss! However, once you become aware of a personality disorder you can learn how to adjust and cope with the strange behaviors.

Top Five Ways to Deal with Histrionic Personality Disorder Sufferers

You’ve now learned what HPD is and how to recognize it. Let’s conclude this article by looking at the five best ways of coping with people suffering from HPD:

1. Stay calm when interacting with them. HPD sufferers can easily become agitated. By being calm around them you’ll help to de-escalate any over-the-top behaviors or emotions.
2. Keep your distance. Whether sitting or standing it’s important to keep a reasonable distance (e.g., 3 or 4 feet) from HPD sufferers. This is because HPD sufferers typically have a hard time understanding boundaries. If you get too close they may act inappropriately towards you.
3. Question their behavior. For this method to be successful, you must only question their behaviors in a gentle, friendly manner. For instance, if you feel their outlandish clothes are unsuitable for a serious event such as a funeral, this is a good time to ask them questions. You could word it this way: “Your clothes are amazing, but don’t you think something a little plainer would be more suitable for the funeral?”
4. Recommend they take up meditation or yoga. Meditation and yoga are known for relieving stress and inducing calmness. These are positive traits that can be especially beneficial to a HPD sufferer. If you already practice meditation or yoga, then why not ask the HPD sufferer to come along to a class?
5. Suggest they seek treatment from a mental health therapist.^[4] If interacting with a HPD sufferer is proving too much for you, then you should definitely suggest to them that they seek professional counseling. A qualified mental health therapist will be able to help the HPD sufferer to manage the symptoms. Excessive attention seeking can be a warning sign that someone is suffering from Histrionic Personality Disorder. By learning the symptoms associated with Histrionic Personality Disorder, you can quickly identify affected individuals. Once you become aware of someone suffering from this disorder you can take the recommended steps above to help both them and yourself.

Reference

[1]	^	MSD Manuals: Histrionic Personality Disorder
[2]	^	American Psychiatric Association: What are Personality Disorders?
[3]	^	Merriam-Webster: Histrionic
[4]	^	Good Therapy: Find the Right Therapist

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Signs of a Commitment Phobe and How to Deal with Him/Her

This may be one of the most common of relationship woes. Many of us have been in this situation.

I remember a time when I was totally head over heels for someone. I imagined, whether rightly or wrongly, that I connected to them, and they connected to me on a level that seemed beyond communication – almost instinctive.

But over time, when I imagined that connection to grow, the connection to become stronger…nothing happened. The relationship, whatever it was, seemed to stall.

The answer, when revealed, was simple: She was a commitment phobe.

Sometimes Love Could Go Wrong

Love, when it works, when two people just click, is something indescribable. But when something is wrong, love can cause significant grief and stress.

Commitment phobia has been the ending of a great many relationships. With a commitment phobic partner, you may start to doubt every aspect of your relationship with them, and perhaps even yourself.

To avoid it, commitment phobia needs to be understood.

About Commitment Phobia

Interestingly, if someone has a commitment phobia, this phobia may affect other areas of their life. They may find it stressful if they are faced with having to decide on things that will affect them long term.

As such, this may mean that their reluctance to commit to you romantically may not stem from them not being fully invested, but it may be a genuine mental health condition^[1].

Why are People Having Commitment Phobic?

In psychology, there are four different kinds of attachment a person may have with another. The idea of this is called attachment theory^[2].

Normally, attachment theory is used to describe attachments formed in childhood, but can be applied for adults in romantic relationships. There are three forms of attachment that may explain a commitment phobic person’s thoughts and actions:

1. Fearful Avoidant. Someone with a fearful/avoidant romantic connection may actually want a strong lasting relationship; however, they may have fears about the future of the relationship. Fearing that they will be hurt in the future may make them wary of fully committing.
2. Dismissive Avoidant. Someone with this connection may dismiss their want or need for a romantic relationship, and may see no reason to form a lasting relationship. Drop ’em fast.
3. Anxious preoccupied. Here a person may want a relationship, but out of insecurity may doubt your commitment to it, and think you may soon regret it.

As such, the issue might be way more than them wanting to keep their options open (or even keep the relationship open.) There might be an underlining psychological grounding for their reluctance to commit.

Spotting a Commitment Phobic Person

How can you tell who is or is not a commitment phobe?

Luckily there are signs that the person you’re with is afraid of commitment. Here are some:

• They frequently quit jobs^[3] and leave careers. Though this could be a sign that they aren’t satisfied with their job, it may also suggest that they generally avoid committing to something.
• Similarly, it may be a red flag if you know that they have been in many brief relationships with no past commitment^[4]) shown.
• They may run far away from the mere suggestion of the “L” word, or even be uncomfortable defining the relationship at all. Doing so makes the relationship something more concrete in their minds. Not something easily left or broken.
• They have trouble committing to attending events until close to the time.
• They are generally unreliable, and unpredictable.
• They avoid introducing you to their family or close friends. This, in a sense, shows that they are keeping you in a separate compartment of their personal life – a compartment easily abandoned with no affect to the others.

If these sound familiar, then you should be wary. However, if you are indeed in a relationship with someone who refuses to commit, what are the best courses of action (aside from simply leaving them)?

You Want a Commitment Phobe to Change

If, of course, their reluctance to commit stems from psychological issues, then the best way for them to heal is with a degree of therapy. However, that is a tricky, time consuming process, and requires them to actively want to change their behavior; this would be a wonderful and positive step – however, it cannot be guaranteed.

So, What Should You Do?

Firstly, it could be a good idea to slowly start a hard to get^[5]approach; make yourself slightly less available to them. This is a very risky strategy; if they are truly commitment phobic, then this could lead to them drifting away, thus ending the relationship. However, as much as it could encourage them to drift away, it also may encourage them to work harder. If they truly want the relationship work, they will have to work for it.

Always Put Yourself in the First Place

Always – this goes above all – put your own interests and needs first. A relationship is between two people; it’s natural for two people to think and feel different things. If they’re causing you undue stress through their fears of commitment (which may also show that they are putting their own interests first anyway), then perhaps it might be worth considering if they are worth this stress and anxiety.

If they are, then keep on, and hope love makes things develop.

If you are unsure, then maybe give them a time limit. If the period of uncertainty isn’t over by a certain time, for example a month, then perhaps it was not to be.

This realization can be hard in and of itself.

In the end, the issue is a complicated one. Matters of the heart always are. But love, when it works, is worth it. It’s just not always as you expect it.

Reference

[1]	^	GoodTherapy.org: Commitment issues
[2]	^	GoodTherapy.org: Attachment issues
[3]	^	Psychology Today: 10 Signs That Your Lover Is Commitment Phobic
[4]	^	Your tango: 42 Signs You’re In Love With A Commitment-Phobe (Sorry!
[5]	^	eHarmony: Are you dating a Commitment-Phobe?

The post Signs of a Commitment Phobe and How to Deal with Him/Her appeared first on Lifehack.

Love Doesn't Come and Stay for Good. You Have to Learn These Communication Tricks

Have you ever caught yourself complaining about your romantic relationship to a friend. Ever heard yourself saying things like:

“He just never listens to me!”

“She doesn’t talk to me when she’s angry!”

“I just feel like we argue all the time.”

Guess what? You might need to develop your communication skills with your significant other.

Nobody Can Get Along with Another Person 100% of the Time

Spending a lot of time with another person increases the possibility that you two will not always agree with each other. Remember, that’s normal. Nobody can get along with another person 100% of the time. But these disagreements can easily turn into arguments if you don’t work on improving your communication skills.

All Relationship Problems Originate with Bad Communication Skills

Having good communication skills increase your chances of having a happy, fulfilling, and successful relationship.^[1] If you both work together toward improving your communication skills, your relationship will begin to grow and develop in ways you didn’t think possible before. Remember, all relationship problems originate with bad communication skills.^[2]

To get you started, let’s take a look at some of the most common communication pitfalls in relationships and tricks you can use to achieve improved communication skills.

4 Deadly Communication Pitfalls You Must Avoid

Letting your emotions take over.

When you get into a disagreement with your partner, it can be easy to let anger work its way into the conversation. Susan Heitler, PhD and couples psychologist, says, “The hotter you get, the more likely it is that you’ll race full speed ahead down the criticism and blame road.”^[3]

How many times have one of your disagreements turned into you blaming them for something?

Using blaming language.

While talking to your partner, if you begin a statement with “you always”, it sets the conversation up for an argument and makes the listener think you don’t want to work as a team.^[4] This is because your partner will automatically become defensive, expecting to be blamed for something.

Listening to respond instead of listening to understand.

If you find yourself thinking of how you’re going to respond to what your partner is saying, you’re far more likely to interrupt them. Interrupting your partner lets them know that you don’t really care about what they have to say. ^[5] And this obviously won’t end well.

Avoiding difficult conversations.

Maybe there’s a specific topic that the two of you can never discuss without an argument. You assume that the best thing to do is to avoid the difficult conversations, so you two avoid a heated discussion.

Only 4 Tricks Are Needed To Make A Change

Give yourself a brief moment of silence.

If you feel yourself getting angry or you catch yourself criticizing your partner, take a step back from the conversation. You need a moment to think and maybe even get away from your partner for a few minutes. If neither of you can calm down, consider having the conversation at a later date. Emotions do not allow for healthy communication skills.

Use “I” statements and “we” language instead.

Make your feeling or thoughts clear and present them in a non-critical way by using “I” statements.^[6]

Saying something like “I feel” or “I worry” is much better than “you did X”. Also, remind your partner that you view your relationship as a team by using “we” language to be more inclusive.

Stop interrupting and be aware of the body language.

It’s more than that, though. It’s easy to wait for your turn to speak. Instead, try to really understand what they’re saying.

Paying attention to their body language and facial expressions can help you really understand the point that your partner is trying to make.^[7]

Talk about everything. Literally.

Confront the awkward conversations and difficult topics. Having a healthy, long-term relationship means being able to deal with everything together, as a team.

The more of these uncomfortable discussions the two of you can have, the more confident and trusting you’ll feel in your relationship.^[8]

In the end, working on improving your communication skills with your partner will give you a much healthier relationship. A relationship where the two of you can focus on growing as individuals and as a team.

Reference

[1]	^	HealthyPsych: 18 Communication Tips for Couple
[2]	^	WebMD: 7 Relationship Problems and How to Solve Them
[3]	^	PsychCentral: 5 Communication Pitfalls and Pointers for Couples
[4]	^	Lifehack: 15 Common Communication Mistakes That You Might Be Making
[5]	^	Bustle: The 11 Biggest Communication Mistakes Couples Make
[6]	^	EffectiveCommunicationAdvice: 10 Tips for Effective Communication for Couples and Marriage
[7]	^	EffectiveCommunicationAdvice: 10 Tips for Effective Communication for Couples and Marriage
[8]	^	MindBodyGreen: 5 Communication Mistakes that Kill Relationships

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Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

A study ^[1] published in Depression and Anxiety found that social media users are more likely to be depressed. This was just one of the huge number of studies linking social media and depression^[2] . But why exactly do platforms like Facebook and Instagram make people so unhappy? Well, we don’t know yet for sure, but there are some explanations.

Social Media Could Lead to Depression

Depression is a serious medical condition that affects how you think, feel, and behave. Social media may lead to depression in predisposed individuals or make existing symptoms of depression^[3] worse explains^[4] the study above’s senior author Dr. Brian Primack. So, the problem may not be in social media per se, but how we use it.

Signs You’re Suffering From “Social Media Depression”

If you feel like social media is having a negative impact on your mood, then you may be suffering from “social media depression.” Look for symptoms like:

• low self-esteem,

• negative self-talk,

• a low mood,

• irritability,

• a lack of interest in activities once enjoyed,

• and social withdrawal.

If you’ve had these symptoms for more than two weeks and if this is how you feel most of the time, then you are likely depressed. Although “social media depression “is not a term recognized in the medical setting, social media depression seems to be a real phenomenon affecting around 50% of social media users. As explained in a review study^[5] published in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, if a person has a certain predisposition to depression and other mental disorders, social media use may only worsen their mental health.

Social Media Could Crush Self-Esteem

We know that social media and depression are in some way linked, but why is this so? Well, according to Igor Pantic, MD, Ph.D.^[6], social media use skews your perception about other people’s lives and traits. To explain this further, most people like to portray an idealized image of their lives, personal traits, and appearance on sites like Facebook and Instagram. If you confuse this idealized image with reality, you may be under the false impression that everyone is better than you which can crush your self-esteem and lead to depression. This is especially true for teens and young adults who are more likely to compare themselves to others. If you already suffer from low self-esteem, the illusion that everyone has it better off than you will just make you feel worse.

Causing Social Isolation and Other Negative Emotions

Another commonly cited reason for the negative impact of social media on mental health is its link with social isolation. Depressed people are more likely to isolate themselves socially and chose only to interact indirectly through social media platforms. But communication online tends to be superficial and is lacking when compared to real-life interaction explains Panic. What this means is not that social media leads to isolation but the other way around, possibly explaining why we find so many depressed persons on these sites.

Lastly, social media use may generate negative emotions in you like envy, jealousy, dislike, loneliness, and many others and this may worsen your depressive symptoms.

Why We Need to Take This Seriously

Both depression and social media use are on the rise according to epidemiological studies. Since each one has an impact on the other, we have to start thinking of healthier ways to use social media. Teens and young adults are especially vulnerable to the negative impact of social media on mental health.

Advice on Social Media Use

Although these findings did not provide any cause-effect explanation regarding Facebook and depression^[7], they still do prove that social media use may not be a good way to handle depression. For this reason, the leading authors of these studies gave some suggestions as to how clinicians and people can make use of such findings.

One suggestion is that clinicians should ask patients about their social media habits. Then they can advise them on how to change their outlook on social media use or even suggest limiting their time spent on social media.

Some social media users may also exhibit addictive behavior; they may spend too much time due to compulsive urges. Any compulsive behavior is bound to lead to feelings of guilt which can worsen depressive symptoms.

Having Unhealthy Relationship with Social Media

If you feel like your relationship with social media is unhealthy, then consider the advice on healthy social media use provided by psychology experts from Links Psychology^[8]:

Avoid negative social comparison – always keep in mind that how people portray themselves and their lives on social media is not a realistic picture, but rather an idealized one. Also, avoid comparing yourself to others because this behavior can lead to negative self-talk.

Remember that social media is not a replacement for real life – Social media is great for staying in touch and having fun, but it should never replace real-world interactions.

Avoid releasing personal information – For your safety and privacy, make sure to be careful with what you post online.

Report users who bully and harass you – It’s easy to be a bully in the anonymous and distant world of social media. Don’t take such offense personally and report those who abuse social media to harass others.

The bits of advice listed above can help you establish a healthy relationship with social media. Always keep these things in mind to avoid losing an objective perspective of what social media is and how it is different from real life. If you are currently suffering from depression, talk to your doctor about what is bothering you so that you can get the treatment you need to get better. Tell your doctor about your social media use and see if they could give you some advice on this topic.

Reference

[1]	^	NCBI: Association between Social Media Use and Depression among U.S. Young Adults
[2]	^	ConsumerHealthDigest: Having Multiple Social Media Accounts Tied to Depression
[3]	^	ConsumerHealthDigest: Depression Symptoms – Can Depression Lead to Suicide?
[4]	^	Health: The Complex Link Between Social Media and Depression
[5]	^	NCBI: Online Social Networking and Mental Health
[6]	^	NCBI: Online Social Networking and Mental Health
[7]	^	ConsumerHealthDigest: Bad Experiences on Facebook Tied to Depression
[8]	^	Links Psychology: How do I keep my social media use healthy?

The post Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression appeared first on Lifehack.

Here Are 30+ Easy High Fibre Breakfast Ideas You Can Try At Home

In the everyday hustle and bustle of life, it is not easy to recognize subtle changes manifesting in the body. When something is not quite right,the body sends out warning signs of discomfort. We tend too dismiss these signs quicker than the 6am alarm and get some quick fix medication without dealing with the root of the problem

Scientific evidence ^[1] clearly points out the root most health issues are poor diet habits leading nutritional deficiencies.

These problems build up gradually and may not be easy to notice. The best way to tell if your diet is in good tact is by being on the lookout for the main warning signs of a poor diet .

A proper high fibre breakfast will prevent diabetes, constipation, irritable bowel syndrome, diverticulosis, heart disease, colon cancer and hemorrhoids. Good food essentially amounts to maintaining good health. Consume more oats,brown rice seeds,greens and nuts.

Signs That You Are Not Eating Enough Fibre.

Do you feel like you are carrying huge baggage in your stomach?

When you visit the loo less than three times a week for bowel movements you are most probably constipated. Constipation is caused by a lack of insoluble fibre in your daily diet. The best way to remedy this is adding more wholewheat bread, seeds, brown rice and fruits into your meals.

Are you starting to gain weight?

Vegetables high in fibre usually make you chew for a longer time and fills you up, decreasing food intake. Try skipping french fries and rather opt for lentils or steamed broccoli that has high fibre content

Are you always feeling hungry?

Snacks that are highly processed will leave you unsatisfied. Foods low in fibre leave you with hungry pangs much sooner than a high fibre meal. Try adding legumes to your salad or sprinkle some flax seed into your oatmeal. Both are great soluble fibre sources .

Try nutritious and health snacks rather than indulging in processed junk.

• A snack rich in vitamin A, like sweet potato chips cooked in olive oil.
• A snack rich in vitamins A, C and K, like Kale leave chips drizzled in olive oil.
• A surprising antioxidant and fibre source is a bowl of popcorn.

Do you have a high cholesterol condition?

Fibre can reduce your hunger pangs, it also lower cholesterol levels. Soluble fiber combines with small intestine cholesterol, keeping it away from the blood stream.

Do You Have high blood sugar?

Fibre is known to delay the sugar absorption of sugars into the blood stream. This makes the blood sugar levels rise at a slower pace .

Does your digestion hurt?

When you begin to develop irritation and pain in your larger intestine lining due to an inflamed pouch, it is a diverticulitis condition that is correlated with a diet low in fibre . In more severe cases, diverticulitis can cause vomiting, diarrhea, fever and bloating.

Here we offer you some easy, quick and high fibre content breakfast for you to try!

Sweet morning delicacies

Boxed cereals , even if they may be labeled as healthy usually have refined flour,artificial colors, corn syrup and sugar. The health dangers that lurk in processed cereal is the same as those in a can of soda.

Let us start each day with a boost of high fibre breakfasts.

1. Chia Seeds and Oats

Chia seeds are the super seeds keeping the body hydrated and improving overall endurance. Wake up to a breakfast leaving you fueled with healthy fats, fiber and calcium.

2. Seeds with Peanut butter on Toast

A daily dose of breakfast fibre is easy to prepare with a sprinkle of flax and chia seeds. Your morning will launch with a jump-start digestion together with B-vitamins, fatty acids and calcium. It will ensure bone ,blood, as well as heart health.

3. Overnight Vanilla Oats

Figs,two fresh fruit, and some dates with vanilla oatmeal soaked overnight, gets together a naturally sweet bowl full of fibre, calcium, potassium and antioxidants.

4. Strawberry and Chocolate Kale

Some sprinkled cocoa together with the vitamin-rich fibre rich leafy green, Kale, in rolled oats, sliced fruit and nut butter makes an intriguing breakfast.

5. Oatmeal and Banana

Oatmeal together with fiber rich bananas and walnuts to fill you up is packed with protein and fibre keeping energy intact right through the usual mid-morning down slide.

6. Brown Rice Breakfast

Brown rice does not need to be limited to lunch and dinner menus! The nutty, fiber- filled grain makes a delectable breakfast . Add some maple syrup in a mix of apple chunks and dates, spiced with cinnamon for a gluten-free healthy morning boost.

7. Quinoa and Strawberry Parfait

Quinoa seeds has an impressive fibre and protein profile. With alternate layers of seeds in cloudy pillows of Greek yogurt and a dash of walnuts, quench you morning hunger with a superfood heart-healthy meal to start your day.

8. Blueberries and Seeds

Raw blue berries with some almond milk , sunflower, flax,hemp and chia seeds leaves you with a gluten and dairy free morning mix loaded with nutritional goodness to kick-start the day

SAVOURY MORNING TREATS

9. Veggie Packed Burrito

A high fibre tortilla Burritos wrapped in your choice of veggies makes a a filling breakfast that is great tasting,nutritious ans easy to make.

10. Spinach and Tofu Quiche

A vegan breakfast recipe with dried tomatoes, spinach and tofu and is rich in fibre and boosts the immune system.

11. Lentil Savory

Lentils are rich in minerals , high fiber and a low GI making it an ideal breakfast. Packed with irons and B vitamins, lentils for breakfast are a healthy start to the day.

12. Chickpea Flour Pizza

Chickpea flour is a nutrition powerhouse, with fibre, plant protein and iron. Ground chickpeas pizza is a great base skipping the kneading, chilling an rising process. Top up with avocado and salsa for a gluten-free powerhouse of essential nutrients .

13. Breakfast Quesadilla

A breakfast Quesadilla is versatile with ingredients to suit preferences. A combination of spinach and white beans and white cheddar cheese make a rich power packed filling for any morning.

14. Avocado and Salmon Salad

Avocado with smoked salmon slices and some fibrous vegetable packs a healthy punch running past lunchtime.

15. Sweet Potato and Spinach

Spinach full of fibre and tomatoes, together with slow-digesting sweet potato carbohydrates is a great way to power through to lunchtime.

16. Savory Oatmeal

A savory oatmeal version includes a unique combination of feta and pine nuts together with the antioxidants and sweetness from figs.

17. Avocado and Chickpea Toast

Avocado toast is trendy on brunch menus these days. Add on , paprika chickpeas. It will add satisfying crunch, and generous portion of protein and fibre.

18. Hummus Wrap

High-fibre grains and greens make a nutritious wrap can proven to not only benefit but improves overall health.

19. Green Delicacies on Wholegrain

Chopped broccoli, chickpea with avocado cubes on wholegrain toast, muffins or pita is a perfect alternative to greasy fried eggs.

 Breakfast Power Smoothies

20. Blueberry Muffin Smoothie

A blueberry muffin drink will steer you out of morning grogginess . The lavender concoction is packed with high-quality antioxidants from the blueberries. Oats ans chia seeds add in the extra fibre.

21. Peanut Butter and Jelly Smoothie

A banana mixed in peanut butter spoonfuls enough with added oats and chia seeds too. The result is complex carbohydrates with fatty acids that guarantee satisfaction.

22. Pineapple Coconut Smoothie

Pineapple has effective important dietary coconut is filled wit fibre, vitamins E, C, and B as well as iron, selenium, calcium ,sodium, phosphorous and magnesium, making the combo a nutritious smoothie.

23. Raw Banana and Cacao

The smoothie is high in calcium fiber and protein, and will fill you up for hours. Plus a great excuse to get some chocolate with breakfast.

24. Kale Smoothie

This is a perfect way of serving the Kale with all its nutrient content and health benefits and nutrient content . Kale is filled with minerals and vitamins including vitamin C, A and K together with potassium, copper and iron. This high in fiber superfood stabilizes the blood sugar levels keeping the digestive tract smooth.

25. Strawberry and Orange Smoothie

This tropical smoothie tropical smoothie has a mixture Greek yogurt blended with coconut milk, orange juice and strawberries, it is low in calories and creamy smooth!

26. Kale,Acacia and Berry Smoothie

A combination of blueberries,banana and strawberries go a long way and you are left with a juicy ,sweet and delicious fruity flavour, enhanced with acai powder fading away the taste of kale.

27. Classic Green Monster Smoothie

Spinach in a mix of chia seeds,peanut butter is served up in a smoothie full of vitamins A, K and C, and K together with magnesium, fiber and calcium.

28. Strawberry and Banana Smoothie

Strawberry and -Banana with almond milk, chia seeds, and pumpkin seeds with cacao nibs, and flaked coconut make a perfect combo smoothie.

 29. Sage Pear Smoothie

Moringa is a special ingredient in the smoothie. Moringa is a plant with stress management and anti-aging benefits. It helps the body detoxify. With blend of hemp seeds, rich in Omega 3 and fatty acids, with a Vitamin E, this smoothie ensures a healthy body and clear mind .

30. Cherry Berry Ginger Smoothie

This is a recovery smoothie containing strawberries rich in anti oxidants. Kale, wheatgerm together with vitamin C eases pain makes it decrease muscle damage induced by exercise.

Featured photo credit: Pixabay via pixabay.com

Reference

[1]

^

SOURCE:Influence of Individual and Combined Health Behaviors on Total and Cause-Specific Mortality in Men and WomenThe United Kingdom Health and Lifestyle Survey

The post Here Are 30+ Easy High Fibre Breakfast Ideas You Can Try At Home appeared first on Lifehack.