Tuesday, 26 June 2018
13 Ideas on How to Help Depression That Just Won’t Go Away
You’ve been to the doctor, you’ve seen a therapist, you’ve spent time with people who love you. In short, you’ve done everything people say you should do when it comes to overcoming depression. Yet no matter what you do, that depression just won’t go away. After all that, with those feelings of hopelessness, despair, fatigue [...]
20 Best Places to Work for a Great Career in 2018
Looking for a job? There’s no doubt to the fact you will want to work with a company that appreciates you for who you are. Well, good news. The labor market today is one that has peened up with more opportunities for advancement and personal employee improvement. This is partly due to the fact that [...]
Monday, 25 June 2018
How to Survive a Midlife Crisis in Men (the Definitive Guide)
If you believe that you’re having a midlife crisis – even if you aren’t middle-aged – I can assure you that you’re not alone. I can also assure you that it’s never too late to start creating the kind of life that you want. So many of us slog through each day, only to look [...]
Conflict Management: How to Turn Any Conflicts into Opportunities
There’s a lot out there written on conflict from how to ask what you really want and how to understand what the other side really wants. But what I have seen from those materials is that most of them have been written in bubbles using armchair philosophy with almost zero empirical evidence and applicability in [...]
Friday, 22 June 2018
7 Super Fast Remedies for a Pulled Muscle in Neck
Imagine if you could apply a simple strategy to stop feeling that stingy pain in your neck. That pain that made you utter “not again!” once you’ve crawled out of your bed in the morning. Don’t worry! In this article, you will learn 7 super fast remedies for your pulled muscle in neck. If you [...]
Thursday, 21 June 2018
How Relaxing Music for Kids Can Help ADHD (+ Music Recommendations)
Think about it, that adrenalin-pumping playlist on your iPod motivates us to keep going with our workout far more effectively than any fitness coach; whilst that mix of soft, gentle piano music can really help us unwind after a long, tiring day. No matter what’s going on in our lives, it’s rare to find a [...]
Wednesday, 20 June 2018
18 Fun Activities for Kids to Do on a Rainy Day
For energetic and restless kids, being cooped up inside can be a damper. The same toys and books can get boring quickly. It may be tempting and easy to resort to screen time to keep your kids entertained but there are so many other activities that are much more beneficial for their development and creativity. [...]
6 Compelling Reasons to Try Couples Yoga (And the Best Poses to Try)
Yoga is an integrated exercise that includes training both body and mind. In addition to contemplation, its techniques are numerous including relaxation and physical movements. Yet couples yoga is unique in its nature and reasons. It has its own compelling reasons that make it both necessary and fun. Sometimes intimate couples’ relationship undergoes some kind [...]
Tuesday, 19 June 2018
How To Raise Healthy, Happy Kids After Going Through a Divorce
I have had several friends vow to never marry in life because they were so traumatized by their parent’s divorce. Divorce can be extremely difficult on children. Many times they don’t understand why the divorce had to happen or they may blame themselves as the cause of the divorce. They can also develop a deep [...]
15 Trustworthy Techniques to Prevent Relationship Problems
One of the most exciting times is the feeling of entering into a new romantic relationship with someone. You can’t get enough of the other person as the two of you are floating on cloud nine. Unfortunately, this period commonly known as the honeymoon phase is just that. It’s a phase. Small things start to [...]
Monday, 18 June 2018
What Foods Have the Most Brain Vitamins for Enhanced Mental Strength
Your brain is the house your mind lives in. The brain is the most high-powered organ we have and requires the right amount and type of fuel to work properly. When we don’t give our brain the right fuel, it slows us down, dampers our focus, makes us more unhappy and unmotivated. If you want [...]
Smart Goals Template to Help Leaders Attain Success Easily
Recently, I wrote about how to make SMART goals work for you and explained why your “why” was the missing piece of the SMART goal formula. In this article, I am going to take you through the steps of using SMART goals to achieve your goals as a leader of a team of people and [...]
Thursday, 14 June 2018
How to Nix Your Credit Card Debt in Less Than 3 Years
Debt is never a fun thing to be in. But, there are many actions that you can take that will help you rid yourself of the burden of debt once and for all. By coming up with a set plan, eliminating your debt can feel much easier than constantly thinking about it. This post will [...]
Wednesday, 13 June 2018
Meditation for Beginners: How to Meditate Deeply and Quickly
Imagine yourself running at top speed. After a few minutes pass, you feel yourself slowly getting out of breath. You feel the aches in your muscles as your body slows down but you keep pushing yourself to keep going. Eventually, you collapse because you’ve exhausted all energy and you can no longer function. For many [...]
Tuesday, 12 June 2018
How Much Money Do I Need to Retire? Find Your Answer Here
It is never too early nor is it ever too late to start planning for retirement. It ultimately depends on your way of life, where are you living, and whether you need to let go of anything. A successful retirement strategy is to have enough pay to cover your expenses with a little cash going [...]
Monday, 11 June 2018
Can a Dysfunctional Family Become Functional?
A dysfunctional family is more than disagreement or constant arguments. Anything from plain neglect, to abuse and even verbal and physical violence is the everyday experience of those who are part of a dysfunctional family. You know how this looks: Parents constantly comparing children. Siblings in conflict because of tolerated bullying. Domestic violence. Adultery… And [...]
Writing Journal for a Better and More Productive Self (The How-To Guide)
How many times have rampant thoughts distracted you from your work? How many times have ideas popped in and popped out before you had a chance to capture them? Or maybe clarity has gone missing in action and you would like to find it again? As a busy person, it is not uncommon for your [...]
8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies
We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all. Regardless of how you got this [...]
Signs Your Lack of Sleep Is Slowly Killing You (And How to Turn Around)
You hear it over and over again like a broken record: get good sleep on a daily basis, or you’ll suffer the consequences. Genetically, there are the lucky few who can get away with a lack of sleep and still function at a high level. Let’s face it though — that isn’t you. Getting great [...]
Thursday, 7 June 2018
The Ultimate Morning Routine to Make You Happy And Productive All Day
Let me just start by saying, I’m not what you would consider a morning person. I’m not a terrible dragon by any means. But, with three kids, the dog, a job and an active life, I have to admit that I like my sleep.
My husband was reading a book recently about the power of a morning routine. I asked him to share the summary of what he learned. It all sounded great; but the idea of implementing a lengthy morning routine or getting up an hour early to do a variety of things makes me want to go right back to bed. We only have so much ‘bandwidth’ and willpower in a day, and personally, I don’t want to use it all up by 7am.
When I asked what he had done with this book’s great suggestions, the answer was nothing. He loved the ideas and concepts but hadn’t changed anything in his life.
This is the thing about most advice (on any topic really). It’s not that it doesn’t work, it’s that it doesn’t work for everybody. Any habit you are trying to change or create needs to take into account your unique personality, lifestyle and challenges.
Have you ever set out with great intentions to do something – a new diet, exercise regimen or morning routine, only to fall flat on your face a few days or weeks later? Then what? You beat yourself up that you didn’t do it ‘right’, that you failed.
Here’s the thing, you haven’t failed, you have just found something that doesn’t work for you. And now, it’s time to find something that does. What works for a friend, colleague or spouse will not necessarily work for you.
There is a perfect morning routine that will make YOU happy and productive all day – you just have to find yours.
Which is why, rather than give you a specific, one-size-fits-all morning routine, I’m going to give you some options. Think of it like a menu. You get to choose what makes sense for your life, with your personality, motivations, goals, desires and circumstances.
The benefits of a morning routine
As Hal Elrod, author of “The Miracle Morning”, says,
“Focused, productive successful mornings generate focused, productive, successful days – which inevitably create a successful life.”
A morning routine is said to boost happiness, increase productivity, reduce stress levels and get you grounded and settled for the day. It’s about getting started on the ‘right foot’.
A morning routine also allows you to start your morning with intention, rather than letting the day run away from you. You control the day; the day doesn’t control you. This positive feeling of being on top of things has results in a positive feeling and effect on your entire day.
As with many things in life, small changes lead to big results. It’s the compounding effect.
Tony Robbins’ morning routine “includes a nutritional supplement, meditation, workout, and sauna-to-cold-plunge combo.” You can check it out here. Arianna Huffington shares hers here.
In fact, most great entrepreneurs and leaders throughout history cite their morning routine as a large contributor to their success. But it’s not just entrepreneurs and leaders that benefit from a morning routine. We all can.
A good friend and colleague of mine just started a new morning routine and here’s what she had to say: “I love waking up before my family and having dedicated ‘me’ time. This means my kids aren’t the ones waking me up… if they’re the ones waking me up, it means I immediately have something to do. Waking up for me, early, gives me time to do what I need so when they wake up, I’m excited to greet them for the day.”
We’ve established a morning routine is important and valuable, are you ready to create yours?
How to create your ultimate morning routine:
As a coach and consultant with a diverse background, it’s important to me to look at this from a wholistic point of view. Let’s look at the morning routine through the lens of Integrative Wellness principles, which take into account the four aspects or ‘systems’ of you: Mental, Emotional, Physical and Spiritual.
You can also think of this as Mind, Heart, Body and Spirit.
You’ll probably notice as we talk through examples that some activities or habits cover multiple systems of your body. Awesome! If you can leverage your time and get two, three or four system benefits for the price of one, even better!
Let’s look at each of these areas more specifically.
Mentally
Put simply, this has to do with your mind, including thoughts, beliefs, values, goals, hopes, dreams, desires and plans.
Some options to create a positive mental space in the morning include:
Set goals.
I have a friend that puts up three Post-it notes every morning. They include the three most important goals she has for the day. This gives her something to focus on – and make sure she achieves throughout her day.
And because it’s only three things, it still leaves room for other things that come up – so there’s built in flexibility too.
Make a list.
Get it off your mind. Sometimes in the night we worry, waking up thinking about what we need to accomplish. This means we wake up already feeling behind. Instead, if there’s something you know you need to do, write it down.
Make a list so you can free you mind for more important thinking.
Create a plan/schedule for the day.
When you know you’ve got a hectic day ahead, a little planning can go a long way. Have a look on your calendar and see what’s there – integrate your goals and your list of to-do’s so you have a plan of action.
Read something that feeds your mind.
My Dad loves reading the Wall Street Journal in the morning. It starts his day on the right foot.
A friend of mine reads for 10 minutes and this habit has brought her immense joy. The way she sees it, if she reads a page a minute, her 10 minutes a day will turn into 3,650 pages read by the end of the year or 12 300-page books! For someone who could never find time to read, she’s now finishing great books and feeling awesome about it.
Emotionally
This is all about your feelings, emotions and relationships. You can think of it as all things related to the heart.
Some things you can do in the morning to help your emotional well-being include:
Express gratitude.
New research continues to surface on the science and benefits of gratitude. Studies have now proven a multitude of benefits from expressing gratitude; ranging from how it improves relationships, physical and emotional health, sleep, mental stamina, energy and overall happiness. I have a simple practice; before I get out of bed in the morning, I think of two things I feel grateful for. In the “5 Minute Journal”, one of the first things you do in the morning is write down three things you are grateful for. You choose the number- but expressing gratitude for a great way to kick-start the day.
Hug your kid, spouse or pet.
Hugging boosts your oxytocin levels (the love hormone), increases serotonin (elevates mood and creates happiness), strengthens the immune system, boosts self-esteem, lowers blood pressure, balances the nervous system and releases tension. Put simply, hugging makes you feel good. Find someone – or something – to hug. It only takes a few seconds and it can put you in a positive mood for the day.
Connect with a friend, family member or anyone who makes you feel joyous, happy and connected.
When I wake up my kiddos, it would be easy to open the door and call for them to get up. Instead, I take a few extra moments to go up to each of them (not easy when they sleep in loft beds), kiss them good morning and take a moment to connect. My husband takes his morning commute time to call friends and family and connect with them. In both approaches, we’re not taking more time out of our day or adding something to our to-do list, we’re including it in something that already is happening in our daily routine.
Identify what makes you feel good.
What brings you happiness, joy or excitement for the day ahead? What makes you feel grounded or connected on a deeper level? Meditation, yoga, breathwork? Get more of that.
Physically
All those things we think about that we can do with our body or physical space. This might include what we eat or drink, how we move and anything that has to do with our physical selves.
Here are some options for increasing your physical well-being in the morning:
Get moving.
Get the blood flowing. We all know the benefits of exercise. This might be a run, hike, trip to the gym, yoga, stretching or finding your own short workout. Remember, what works for one person will not work for everyone.
For example, my husband and I thought it would be a great idea to get a trainer once a week. Every Thursday we woke up at 5:45am, got ready and worked out from 6-7am. This might have seemed like a good idea, but it really didn’t work for me. I really didn’t like getting up that early and forcing my body to work out before it was ready.
I tried it for several months, trying to convince myself it was good for me. But it didn’t feel good. I didn’t enjoy it and it didn’t help me have a more productive day. What does work? My husband gets up and takes the dog for a walk/run and I take my morning hike/do my exercise/yoga once the kids are off to school. Again, this is about what works for you – listen to your body.
Drink lemon water.
Before you reach for that first cup of coffee, reach first for something that hydrates you. I drink warm lemon water. I got this tip from a 94-year-old grandmother in Australia almost 20 years ago. She swore her health and her life benefited from this habit.
Need a few more reasons? Check these out here . I usually throw in a bag of ‘detox’ tea and drink this as I take the kiddos to school.
Eat a good breakfast.
What does that mean for you? A protein smoothie? Great. Avocado Toast? Awesome. Oatmeal? Fantastic. Eat a healthy, ‘real-food’ breakfast to get you going.
Ground yourself.
You can do this in many ways.
A few years back, I was going through a period of high anxiety. A bodyworker recommended I start each day by stepping out of bed and grounding my feet into the earth. I sit at the edge of my bed and feel the earth under my feet for a moment, picturing the roots of a tree. You can then feel this move through your whole spine and body.
While I don’t do this exercise every day, if I wake up feeling slightly anxious or stressed, I take the extra minute to ground and get connected. Another technique I use most days is to place one hand on my heart and one on my stomach and just breathe for a few minutes. This instantly calms and relaxes my entire body.
Clean your physical space.
When our physical space is cluttered, our minds often feel the same way.
What makes you feel settled? I have a client who feels better when she makes her bed. If she doesn’t, her day seems to go downhill.
What works for you? Tidy up your workspace. Get the clothes in the hamper. Whatever makes you feel more settled in your physical space, it is worth the effort.
Read this article if you aren’t sure how to declutter.
Spiritually
This can be anything related to you and a feeling of inspiration, which means, ‘in spirit’. While it doesn’t have to convey religion, it may for you. It’s more about what you need to feel connected to something deeper, bigger, higher – and what makes you feel most connected to yourself.
Here are a few examples:
Meditation.
While some of you may be reading this thinking, YES, I love my morning meditation practice, others might be feeling a sense of stress or trepidation reading yet another article about meditation.
If you’re feeling hesitant but want to try it out, there are a ton of great apps (The Mindfulness app, Headspace and Calm) and other resources out there for you. I found this guided morning mediation years ago and still use it when I need something short and sweet.
I also love the free 21-day guided meditations from Deepak Chopra and Oprah Winfrey Many clients and friends have found this an ‘easy entry’.
And, if you’re one of those people who feel they can’t meditate (I feel you, I WAS one of you!), guided meditations are your new best friend. Check out a few and see what works for you.
Be in nature.
Find a place you can sit or walk and just be. Notice the colors of the trees and the sky, the smells in the air. What do you hear if you listen closely? Take a moment to feel the earth beneath your feet or the breeze against your face.
Take a walk in nature and you’ve got physical and spiritual needs covered all in one go!
Interestingly, I was raised Jewish and went to temple growing up. Until at some point along the way, my Mom decided that the best way for her to connect with something greater than herself was to be outside. From that moment on, we spent all of our ‘high holidays’ outside in nature together.
Religious study.
My brother is an incredible example of this. Every morning, he gets up early and does his bible study. He sits at the kitchen table (or wherever he is at the time), reads a passage and writes notes. He then finishes by writing a note to his wife. Since he’s not a verbal person, it allows him to ensure that his wife knows he is thinking about her.
Incredible and romantic? Yes. This also covers his spiritual and emotional needs in one go. More importantly, it grounds him. It allows him to reflect on the day ahead. It connects him to something greater than himself and makes him feel calm going into the day, knowing that he has invested in his spiritual and personal relationships before anything else.
Connect to yourself.
Know what it means to be true to you and take a moment to get grounded in yourself. Here are 11 Ways to be true to you to get you started.
Additional tips for the ultimate morning routine
As you build your morning routine, there’re things you need to remember.
What to keep in mind
1. A healthy morning routine starts the night before.
Getting quality sleep is essential to starting your mornings off right. Make sure you get the recommended 7-9 hours (or whatever works for you). If you’re going to get up earlier for your morning routine, you need to go to bed earlier.
Here are some basic ways to get a good night’s sleep:
- Get off your electronics at least an hour before bed (and set them to DND or leave them outside of your bedroom).
- Make sure you have a comfortable pillow and mattress.
- Set a consistent sleep routine, reduce outside noise and sleep in a well-darkened room or wear an eye mask.
You may want to take reference of Lifehack’s CEO Leon, who has a consistent night routine to keep him sleep well and wake up energetic.
2. Keep it simple.
Find one or two things (three max) that you feel will work for YOU to get you on a roll. Start with a quick win and work your way up from there.
I don’t recommend choosing eight things and then giving up – or beating yourself up because you couldn’t make it work. If you put too much on your plate, you won’t do anything. Eventually, you’ll want to have at least one activity from each of the four categories, but you can start small and work your way up.
3. Take a test drive.
Once you’ve settled on a few concepts that you think will work for you, try them for a few days before you decide if it does/doesn’t work. Like with any habit, you need at least 21 days to create something that sticks.
4. Set a reminder.
Put something in place that reminds you of your morning routine. Here are 24 habit tracking apps you could try.
Or if you’re more old-school like me, find a symbol to remind you – put a Post-it on your bathroom mirror, a note on the fridge or a physical symbol to remind you what you’re doing.
5. Integrate.
Find ways to integrate your morning routine into what you’re already doing, rather than adding more on your ‘to-do’ list. You can also double up, finding activities that covering a couple multiple ‘systems’ of your body.
What not to do
You now have some great options about what to do. But having a great morning routine that energizes you is also as much about what not to do in the morning!
Think about what doesn’t work for you. Are there things that happen or you do that get you started off on the wrong foot? That pull you off-track or out of stride?
Do you hate waking up to the sounds of the ‘alarm’ and need a better way to rise? Perhaps you are decimated by negativity and need to make sure you protect yourself from negative news or people early in the day?
For me, it’s my phone. I have my best mornings when I don’t check my phone or email. I find that when I check my email, it distracts me from my morning and starts me off in the wrong direction. My mind has gone down a rathole of everything I’ve just read, how I’m going to respond, what I need to do…. and I’m not longer present in my morning. I’ve made it a non-negotiable part of my morning routine to not check my emails before my kids go to school.
Time to build your ultimate morning routine!
You’ve had a look at the menu, now it’s time to decide what you’re going to have. It’s time to create your ultimate morning routine.
Remember, like with anything in life, there’s no one-size-fits all approach. If you’re:
- Someone who thrives from positive energy, make sure whatever you do first gives you that burst of positivity.
- Someone who needs to have a plan, then try the three Post-it strategy or create your plan for the day.
- Someone who needs to physically exert yourself, go for that morning run or hike.
- Someone who needs to think, find time for your reading, strategizing and journaling.
- Someone whose mind races, try meditation.
Take a moment to think about what resonates with you the most. Do you need five minutes or an hour? What feels like it will ground you or energize you?
Maybe there are a couple ideas that stood out, or one in particular you just know you need to do. What can you commit to right now in your life, with your current circumstances and everything you know about you?
Then do it. Get started tomorrow morning.
You’ll be more happy, productive, energized and thankful you did.
Featured photo credit: Twenty20 via twenty20.com
The post The Ultimate Morning Routine to Make You Happy And Productive All Day appeared first on Lifehack.
How to Set Short Term Goals for a Successful and Highly Fulfilling Life
Change begins with hope of what’s possible in your life. Hope leads to a sense of expectancy. Combine this with setting short term goals and the likelihood of being more happy and successful moves from possibility to reality.
Short term goals, when created with well-formed criteria, offer incremental steps towards successfully achieving your bigger goals. In this step-by-step guide, you’ll discover the secret to creating short term goals that will set you up for success and help you sail past challenges of staying motivated easily.
What is a short-term goal?
Short term goals are ‘short’, meaning the time frame can be as short as 10 minutes, a day or as long as a week or a few months. Well-formed short term goals begin with the end in mind.
Quick tip to start: Write down the specific result you’ll be achieving and the date when it will happen. Then work backwards from this date describing what you’ll notice yourself doing (and achieving) until you have the first step you’ll take.
A short-term goal is the smallest step needed for you to reach a bigger goal centered around achieving something you passionately desire.
‘Passionate desire’ is the key. As Tony Robbins says,
People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals – that is, goals that do not inspire them.
Having passion when setting goals means getting your mind and body activated to fuel your energy and focus. Each time you achieve a short term goal, your body celebrates by producing and releasing chemicals such as dopamine, serotonin oxytocin and/or endorphins (feel-good neurotransmitters).
Ian Robertson, cognitive neuroscientist says,
Success and failure shape us more powerfully than genetics and drugs.
The regular release of the body’s natural chemicals supports brain change at a neural level, building your confidence and renewing your goal-oriented focus.
How short term goals make your life more fulfilling
Regardless of the area in your life that you set short term goals, the good news is this will have a ripple effect across all your life domains:
- Improve your career prospects and your sense of identity also shifts.
- Improve your body shape through managing food intake and your energy improves in a way that’s noticeable at work and home.
- Improve your mindset and your attitude changes around how you engage with others.
- Improve your personal health and your desire for self improvement lifts.
How short term goals advance your career
Specifically, you will need short term goals to help with your career. This is also how many people want to utilize short term goals.
Start by planning your career visually
Walt Disney was sacked for lacking imagination. Oprah Winfrey was told she’d never make it in television. Careers are destroyed by naysayers intent on keeping you small. The successful person designs a career goal and then creates incremental steps to ‘ladder up’ with short term goals.
Justin Dry from VinoMofo, a successful Australian wine distribution company, always begins his goal setting process with visual planning. He says,
I need to see it all in front of me like a puzzle I’m putting together. It kind of looks like the workings of a madman with lots of weird and wonderful shapes and lines connecting the words.
Whether you use masses of post-it notes that cover a wall, large sheets of paper to spread your ideas on or a journal to map your path – messy planning gets your ideas out of your head so you see different possibilities and pathways available to you.
Begin this process by asking, “What are my best hopes for my career?” Write them down and place them somewhere you’ll notice them every day.
Make you think like a start-up entrepreneur
While successful career planning starts with a messy and random process to let those ‘idea gems’ – the embryos of well-formed short term goals rise, the next step is taking these nuggets and using them to set your direction.
Think of yourself (and your career) as if you’re the CEO of your own successful start-up – one with a clear vision of what you want and how you’ll get it. Rather than waiting for a boss to give you goals, be proactive and set your own.
Karen Lawson, CEO of Slingshot says,
Set a vision, and be focused on the intent of these goals. Create actions which not only build on those of yesterday, but improve what you do tomorrow. Your pathways will need to be flexible, challenged and accountable.
Begin by listing the bigger steps needed to achieve your goal. Then chunk these down into smaller steps with specific actions needed to achieve them. These action steps are the work horses of your short term goals. Create a specific time frame to complete them and maintain accountability – as if you’re reporting to your ‘higher up’.
Begin this process by asking yourself: “What difference will I notice when I take these steps?” Then ask: “What difference will my boss/es notice when I take these steps?”
Establish ‘triggers’ for your daily habits
Twyla Tharp (born 1941) legendary dancer and choreographer, maintains an exacting routine designed to trick her mind into a daily exercise habit.
I begin each day of my life with a ritual; I wake up at 5:30 A.M., put on my workout clothes, my leg warmers, my sweatshirts, and my hat. I walk outside my Manhattan home, hail a taxi, and tell the driver to take me to the Pumping Iron gym at 91st street and First Avenue, where I workout for two hours. The ritual is not the stretching and weight training I put my body through each morning at the gym; the ritual is the cab. The moment I tell the driver where to go I have completed the ritual.
It’s a simple act, but doing it the same way each morning habitualizes it — makes it repeatable, easy to do. It reduces the chance that I would skip it or do it differently. It is one more item in my arsenal of routines, and one less thing to think about. (The Creative Habit, Twyla Tharp)
To do this list, create a trigger point – the smallest step you’ll do that will catapult you into taking action like Twyla Tharp did. What will be your ritual of ‘getting in the cab’?
Get you to talk about the future
Melanie Perkins CEO of Canva, a thriving design and publishing solution, is known for ‘frequently talking about the future’.
Orienting your thoughts towards a future-focus reinforces how important your vision and goals are to you. Ralph Waldo Emerson famously said, “You are what you think.”
- Make it a habit to read your goals daily.
- Think about what you’ll notice that will be different in your life when you achieve them.
- Express your goals to someone important in your life.
- Whisper them to yourself throughout your day.
Future-focused conversations (both with yourself and others) establish a pattern of expectancy which continue fueling not only your desire, but an expectancy of achieving it.
Manage mental resistance
When you begin with ‘hope’, you activate a sense of ‘expectancy’. A belief that what you want is not only possible, it’s within reach. Hope and expectancy are two powerful motivators in propelling you forward to a successful life. When you’re ‘moving forward‘ with hope, you’re orienting yourself towards a desired future. When ‘moving away from‘ something you perceive as painful you’re activating ‘fear’, which can also be a strong motivator helping you avoid pain; for example, losing your job if your quarterly performance scores don’t improve.
Sarah, a manager at a busy merchandising company saw her doctor because she was feeling tired. After a thorough examination the doctor advised Sarah to lose 15 kilos as this was contributing to her tiredness. The news felt overwhelming as Sarah worked long hours and rarely found time to shop for fresh food, so relied on fast food to keep her going.
For Sarah, the doctor activated her fear by describing what could happen (heart attack and/or diabetes) if she didn’t manage her weight by shedding 15 kilos.
While ‘moving away from’ motivation can be successful, a way of amplifying positive motivators that will see Sarah begin ‘moving towards’ her goal is by talking about what outcomes Sarah would notice by losing 15 kilos. For example, managing her weight may see Sarah being more efficient at work, getting out more socially or feeling more able to manage work pressures and deadlines.
To do this with your own goal setting, think about what’s important to you about achieving your goals. Write down your answers. Ask: “What will you notice that will be different in your life when these changes happen?”
6 Easy steps to success with short term goals
Setting short terms goals will lead you closer to a happier and more successful life, but how to achieve that? Take the following steps and you will start achieving your dreams:[1]
Step 1: Defining your best hopes
Try this process yourself by thinking of an area of your life you’d like to improve.
For example:
- What are your best hopes for your finances?
- What are your best hopes for your relationship?
- What are your best hopes for your career?
- What are your best hopes for your health?
This process involves ‘chunking up’ your ideas so you relate to the outcome. In this process, you go on to achieve not only the goal and the outcome it gives you, but also the transformation of your behavior and mindset that will happen as a result of achieving your goal.
Step 2: Noticing what’s different
The next question to ask yourself is: “What would you notice that was different from the way you usually did things?”
‘Noticing’ helps you build a vision of what could be possible. The richer the description you can build around the tiny details, the more ‘real’ your preferred future becomes.
Step 3: Continue asking: ‘What else?’
Most of us know there’s a hidden reason or a long-buried hope beneath why we want something.
Often times, our ego gets a little defensive about it and protective of it; yet if we dig and resurface a truth, then a weight can be lifted, allowing you a freedom to move forward.
Step 4: Ask: ‘Who else will notice the difference?’
Relationships with family, friends, colleagues and a partner are important. Seeing the change they’ll notice helps put a third person perspective on the differences they notice about the changes they see in you.
Imagine what they will notice about you that would let them know you are somehow different as a result of achieving this goal.
Step 5: Imagine a miracle happened tonight
Imagine that if you went to bed tonight and a miracle happened; and you were the very best version of yourself and that you had achieved your best hopes.
When you woke up tomorrow morning after the miracle happened, what would you notice that would tell you you’ve achieved the change you’re seeking?
Step 6: Describe your day as if the miracle had happened
Go through your day, moment by moment. Begin with what time you’d wake and then describe the differences you’d notice in every tiny action you do. Notice in detail what’s different about this day – a day when you are at your very best because you’re living your best hopes.
4 Proven tools to track your short term goal success
When you set a short term goal, establish a measurement system to track your progress:[2]
1. Create a running tally
One of the best devices to keep your short term goal setting on track is to keep a running record or tally of the number of days in a row that you’ve sustained your goal.
For example, if improving your health is important to you and you plan to reduce your weight by 5 kilos by not eating any foods containing sugar, then set up a simple chart and track how many days in a row you can do this. Aim for 5 days, then 10, then 20 days in a row. If you have a small diversion and eat sugar one day, simply start again.
Once you feel confident that you can continue with this step, add another such as taking 5,000 steps per day. Again, set up a simple tally chart either in your diary or somewhere visible and enjoy marking up one more day that you’ve achieved your short term goal. It won’t be long before your goal of losing 5 kilos is met.
2. Keep a journal
Maintaining a journal will help you focus on identifying the things you’re noticing that are different because you’ve set a well-formed short term goal.
Aim to complete the journal at the end of each day and recall in detail the things that you’re noticing. This helps keep you connected with your desired outcome and the transformation you’re experiencing in both your behavior and mindset.
3. Share your progress with a trusted friend or coach
By voicing the change and expressing how far you’re noticing yourself move towards your goal, you’re reinforcing the power of change you’re experiencing. And you’ll be activating the feel-good neurotransmitters that are so important for bringing your confidence, motivation and positive changes to your brain to succeed.
4. Visualize your progress
Before you go to sleep in the evening, visualize your tomorrow. See yourself continuing to do the things that support your change. Walk yourself through the tiny details that add up to the changes you want to see yourself doing including the time you’ll wake up. In the morning, re-activate the visualization and then ‘step into’ your day.
Summing it up
Change is possible. Short term goals that build upon each other are the stepping stones to achieving your best hopes.
Using your creative imagination by noticing the small differences occurring daily offers a positive way to create practical change in an easy and doable way.
Above all, make sure your goal is powered by ‘passionate desire’ so you achieve your desired outcomes.
Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com
Reference
| [1] | ^ | The Guardian: Dance legend Twyla Tharp on truculent men, selling hot dogs and her idol Agatha Christie |
| [2] | ^ | Business Insider: Here’s how 12 successful CEOs set their goals for the year |
The post How to Set Short Term Goals for a Successful and Highly Fulfilling Life appeared first on Lifehack.
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