12 Yoga Exercises for Beginners to Try at Home

You've heard of the many benefits of yoga but don't know how to start? If you're new to yoga, you might have this misconception in your head that yoga poses are hard to attain. You might also worry about coordinating the beautiful art of inhaling and exhaling while you're practicing certain poses. Well, it's not yoga that's difficult. It's just your obsessing mind. And, therefore, take a deep breath, clear your mind of any resistance and expectations and start off reading this article with a free mind. Yoga is comprised of 300 poses and it's definitely not easy to be able to master all of them. If you're randomly picking up a complex one while leaving the simplest one behind, it might seem impossible. Thus, start by choosing the simplest ones, keep yourself regular with the practice, and let your body adapt to the increasing difficulty levels of yoga poses with the steady flow. Give yourself enough time to master the basics and challenge yourself with the difficult once slowly. That's all! So, if you worry about what are the best yoga poses you can start with and easily practice without a yoga teacher, I'm here to help. Here are 12 best yoga poses that you can do at home:

1. Easy Pose

This is a perfect pose to begun any yoga routine. It is one of the simplest yoga pose and the name literally means pleasure pose. It is done by crossing the legs while sitting so that feet are below knees with back straight and hands rested on the knees with palm up or palm down. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLvJD7iKVhw This asana relaxes the body and tones back which becomes stronger and steadier.

2. Mountain Pose

This is a perfect beginner’s pose for practicing at home. This helps in defining the body posture for next level and complicated poses. This yoga pose begins with standing firm, keeping back and head straight, firming thigh muscles by lifting knee caps, keeping hands parallel to body and lifting bodyweight on toes and maintaining the position for 7-10 seconds before releasing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYhH8Gr35cI The biggest benefit of mastering this posture is that it is the starting point for standing asanas and can be practiced easily at home as a part of morning or evening routine. It helps in improvement of body postures, regular practice keeps thighs & ankles stronger, makes spine more agile and regulates digestive, respiratory, nervous systems.

3. Downward Facing Dog

This yoga pose looks similar to the posture of a dog bent forwards, hence the name meaning down-face-dog-posture. This is a very easy to learn pose and beginners can practice it daily with zero side effects. Start with standing on all four limbs and then lifting your hip to straighten the arms and legs. Shoulders should align with hands and feet should be in line with hips, keeping them straight. Finally, turn your gaze to your navel and hold the posture for few seconds before releasing ad coming to initial position on all four limbs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqOqM79McYY This asana strengthens abdominal muscles, improves circulation and digestion, tones hands & feet and decreases anxiety.

4. Cobra Pose

This is a highly recommended pose for the beginners as it helps in building up stamina for higher level postures and tones the upper body. It starts with laying on the stomach and placing the palms of hands beside shoulders. Then raising the upper body gazing the sky. Once a comfortable height is achieved, press thighs, hips and toes against each other and hold the posture for few seconds before releasing and coming back to same posture of laying on the stomach. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75eZwVHIL-U This asana strengthens spine and tones organs in lower abdomen. It stimulates digestive, urinary and reproductive systems. It opens up lungs and heart and helps in stress release.

5. Warrior Pose

This yoga pose is one of the most graceful asanas in yoga and adds beauty to practice. It has direct benefits to arms, legs and lower back. It starts with placing right foot 3 feet in front of left and turning your right foot 90 degrees while keeping center of heels aligned. Then, lift the fully stretched arms sideways until they are parallel to the ground. Now, move the arms further up joining the palms at top of the head. Release and repeat the pose with left leg in front. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rT--p_cLOc This asana boosts self confidence, improves walking posture and eases stressed shoulders.

6. Bound Angle Pose

The name of this yoga pose means reclining bound angle. It is beneficial in deep relaxation. The pose starts with laying flat on the ground on back and bringing feet close to groin. Then opening up knees until they touch the ground and pressing palms downwards stretched towards feet. Before releasing, hug the knees and roll from side to side. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6tb4TncKhY It stimulates kidneys, bladder and heart and blood circulation. It also stretches inner thigh and groin muscles.

7. Chair Pose

Chair pose starts with doing a chair pose, then slowly raising the arms parallel to the ground and bending the knees to mimic a chair until thighs comes almost parallel to the ground. Hold this pose for as long as possible and then release back to chair pose before relaxing the body. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzoEjquXxIg This pose has more physical benefits than spiritual. It strengthens ankles, calves, thighs and spine, reduces flat feet and stimulates the abdominal organs, diaphragm and heart.

8. Skull Shining Breath

This is a beginner’s yoga breathing exercise. It can be done sitting or standing. It begins with placing right palm on stomach, inhaling passively and exhaling aggressively. Repeat the process for 25 to 30 times. Then increase the number as many as one is comfortable in. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6bnFlVkKrE This exercise reduces back and neck pain, opens up chest & lungs and rejuvenates blood circulation.

9. Bellows Breath

This is a yoga breathing exercise for the beginners. Sit with back supported by a wall or chair, keeping the back straight. Breathe in with nose and breathe out with mouth making a ‘AH’ sound. Once comfortable, breathe out with mouth closed. Practice 3 to 4 sets of 10 breaths. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGQfraq5yRU This exercise increases oxygen content in blood, opens up congested nose & chest, improves appetite and is good for abdominal muscles.

10. Alternate Nostril Breathing

This is one of the deep breathing yoga exercises which stimulates and strengthens the entire respiratory system. This helps to calm your sleep, relax and rejuvenate your mind. It is performed by sitting in a comfortable position with a straight spine. Close the right nostril with right thumb, right ring finger close to left nostril rest of the fingers pointed to the sky. Inhale and exhale with left nostril then with right nostril by closing left one with ring finger and releasing the thumb. Repeat the process back and forth for 15 to 20 times. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RH3n55NnJg8

11. Plank Pose

To begin, lie on the ground with stomach down, place palms beside shoulders, rising up the shoulders while keeping the entire body straight. Hold this pose for 15 to 20 seconds. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ni2BxVc59fk This pose helps in stamina and strength building. You can learn more about this pose benefits here: 7 Amazing Things That Will Happen When You Do Plank Every Day

12. Corpse Pose

This yoga pose is highly recommended for mind and body relaxation. It is one of the simplest asana which is done by laying flat on the ground, facing upwards and relaxing the body. Hold this pose for 3 to 5 minutes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh8z3FHjdW4 This pose is easy to do, reduces stress, anxiety and fatigue. Yoga doesn't have to be complicated to be effective. It's simply meant to make you feel free, powerful, and capable in all aspects of life. It is something you should be able to do without pushing yourself too hard. Start trying these 12 yoga exercises at home and become healthier mentally and physically.

How to Live in the Present and Make Your Time Count

When you woke up this morning, you had a whole day ahead of you. And, when you go to bed, that same day will have passed. This is just how time works, isn't it? You're losing time every second; and try as you may, you can never turn the clock back. Time is such a precious and limited resource, yet often we neglect or abuse it, thinking that there's still time left. We're sometimes so focused on the wrong priorities that we end up spending our precious time on things that won't matter in the long run. And, we may not be spending enough time on the things that do matter. Have you ever reflected on how you're spending your waking moments? Maybe you could use more time in the day to get more work done. Or perhaps you crave spending more time with your family, but always feel overwhelmed with everything on your plate. You might have always wanted to start a hobby, or try something new, but never had the time to because of existing responsibilities. Well, if you don't start now... will you ever? Ask yourself, 'am I really living my best life?'  Below are a few techniques to help you be more aware of your time spent, and how to truly make every second count.

Be Mindful of the Present

Mindfulness can sometimes be a vague term. People often try to be mindful, or in the present, when on holidays, or when spending time with their loved ones. But, what does it really mean to be mindful of the present? Well, it simply means to bring awareness to what you're doing. It's a practice that trains your brain to be more efficient and better integrated with your surroundings, so you're less distracted and more focused. It also helps to minimize stress and allows you to become your best self. So how can you practice mindfulness? It need not take up any of your free time. You can practice mindfulness during routine activities such as when you're brushing your teeth, taking a shower, eating breakfast or walking to work. Zoom in on the sights, sounds, smells, tastes and feelings of these activities that you would otherwise be doing on auto-pilot. A good time to practice is first thing in the morning when you wake up, as it helps set the ‘tone’ of your nervous system for the rest of the day, increasing the likelihood of other mindful moments. One thing to note is that when you're practicing mindfulness, it's okay to let your mind wander. You don't always need to be aware, as the act of noticing that your mind has wandered, and then bringing it back to awareness is in itself beneficial. Our brains respond better to bursts of mindfulness, so it's better to be mindful several times a day, rather than a lengthy one hour session, or even going to weekend retreats. For example, you could focus on how your feet feel in those shoes as you're walking to work, or how your throat and tongue feels when you're sipping on your morning coffee. These only take mere minutes of awareness. Lastly, the best way to cultivate mindfulness in everyday life is to train yourself to meditate. Practicing meditation is learning the language of being present, and helps us tap into mindfulness with little effort.

Appreciate the Here and Now

Besides practicing mindfulness, it's also beneficial to appreciate what you have in your life at this very moment. Whatever you’re doing, whether it's a fun project or a mundane task, appreciate every moment of it, and make an effort to find the enjoyable aspects within it. For example, when walking to your car or to work, really feel the sensations of the pavement on your feet, the breeze in the air, the sights around you. Anything can be enjoyable if you train yourself to see it that way. This can also be applied to doing laundry, washing dishes, or filing taxes! You don't need to only be grateful for the big things in life like money or material possessions. It's the little things in life that if you can appreciate and find meaning in, you're one step closer to truly living in the moment. Stop Multitasking Now this is a controversial one. It used to be that if you could multitask, you were seen as being more efficient and getting more done in less time. However these days, most productivity gurus would agree that multitasking is not the way to go about with efficiency. Shocked? Well, the simple explanation is that when you multitask, your concentration or attention is being split with the number of things you're trying to get done. As a result, you're actually less focused on each task which results in lower productivity, and likely more time needed or lower quality results. So as much as you want to save time, it's better to focus on one task at a time. When you feel the urge to switch to other tasks, pause, breathe, and pull yourself back into the single task you are currently focusing on.

Be Fully Present When Around Others

Often, when we spend time with others, we’re not really there with them. Physically, we may be present, but a lot of times we're distracted by our phones or other devices. If not these, we might be distracted in our minds--thinking about the errands we need to run, or the email we need to reply to, or the dinner plans that we have the next evening. Other times we may listen, but we’re actually thinking about ourselves and what we want to say to the person. This is all pretty common human behavior that most of us are guilty of, but the good news is that with effort, you can shut off the outside world and just be present with the people you’re spending time with. This is a more effective use of your time and helps you connect with people rather than just being in the presence of them. Most people appreciate a deeper connection, especially with those whom they value, so really take time to make that happen.

Take Smartphone Breaks

Now, this is a common tip of which you're probably familiar. But, it's also really helpful-- especially when you're finding yourself constantly distracted at work, or at home while trying to relax. It's useful to disconnect from your phone so that you can focus on other things. The advantage to being connected all the time, of course, is that you have constant and immediate access to news, information, and alerts. But, the downside of that is also that it means you're at the mercy of those incoming demands and alerts. You become accustomed to immediate responses, sometimes at the expense of other experiences. Professor Leslie Parlow of Harvard Business School found in a study that of 1,600 managers and professionals, 70% said they check their phones within an hour of waking up; 56% check their phone within an hour of going to sleep; 51% check their phone continuously during vacation; and 44% said they would experience ‘a great deal of anxiety’ if they lost their phone and couldn’t replace it for a week.((Barri Sambaris: Break the smartphone addiction and increase your productivity)) You may argue that you're not spending your time playing games or going on Facebook, but instead doing something more valuable. But, it's not what you're doing that matters as much as the time you lose when you switch back to a task. When distracted by your phone, and acted upon, it takes up to 23 minutes to get back to the level of concentration where you left off before the interruption. So, if you let your phone interrupt you every 10 minutes, think about how much time and resources you’ve lost in a day?

Don't Rush Through Life

At the end of the day, we all have a limited amount of time on earth, so we should strive to make the most of it. That doesn't mean we should be rushing and trying to do everything at once, so that we forget to smell the roses, be present with our loved ones and appreciate the little things in life. It's more important to know that the time you're spending is spent meaningfully, and that you're prioritizing the right things. If you haven't been living in the present, the time is now! Start practicing some of the tips I've shared above and watch your life transform slowly, as you move towards making every second count.

How to Stop Yourself from Sabotaging Relationships

Love can be challenging at times, especially when you really care about keeping your relationship healthy. The ability to maintain a relationship in the long term isn’t a skill that most people naturally have. You want to make your relationship work yet the reality is that you sometimes sabotage your relationships without even knowing it. Luckily, there are practical ways to stop yourself from sabotaging relationships effectively and I’d like to share some of these helpful methods with you today.

1. Communicate Your Standards and Values Early in the Relationship

You need to know what’s important to you and communicate it early in the relationship. A couple may have been together for five years and now they have major problems. However, closer examination shows that the root of their problems didn’t rock up recently. In fact, the seed of their most common issue of contention was planted very early in the relationship. This happened because the couple didn’t communicate their values and standards at the beginning of their relationship. Initially, they were so crazy about each other; and being truly, madly and deeply in love, they chose to ignore communicating one of the most important parts of a healthy relationship: their values and standards. For example, you’re in a new relationship. Knowing you value quality time together; you expect your partner to have a date night with you at least once a week. However, you soon discover your partner is a workaholic who wants to work seven days a week and is unwilling to invest more time in you. Because you are wildly attracted to them, you ignore this warning flag and continue to emotionally invest in being in a relationship with them. The potential problem is that the attraction isn’t sustainable because the dynamics in this relationship and your values aren’t compatible. In the long term, you become resentful as your partner never seems to have time for you. Then you wonder why you are sabotaging your relationship because you are frequently triggered into angry reactions due to your needs not being met. You know the truth is that you didn’t communicate your values and set your standards early in the relationship, and this has led to ongoing conflict within you. It’s up to you to communicate important values in the early stages of your relationship. A relationship will naturally follow the course and direction you choose for it. If you want to stop yourself from sabotaging relationships, you need to clearly communicate your wants and needs. If you expect your partner to miraculously know your needs without clearly communicating them, chances are you will constantly be disappointed when they are not met. When you are communicating your standards to your partner, remember to be kind, polite and sincere. It’s always easier for someone to accept your viewpoint when they can see you are being mindful of respecting their feelings. In the second place, avoid playing games. Note that honesty is the best policy in all communication with your partner. He or she will appreciate your honesty in this regard because that shows your integrity and strength of character. If you really want to be in a relationship with a person with conflicting values, clear communication becomes even more paramount. For instance, you would like your partner to spend more time with you every weekend, but your partner wants to work 12 hours a day, 7 days a week. You can say this to him or her, “Honey, I understand that your work is very important to you and I really admire your work ethic. Honestly, it will be better for our relationship if we can spend more time together every weekend, because I miss you when you are working all day Saturday and Sunday. Which day do you think we could schedule some time to spend together?” In this example, there is no “but”. When you say something then inject the word “but”, it detracts from what you previously said. For example, if you were to say, “… I really admire your work ethic, but…”, this “but” eliminates the previous statement of appreciation as the word strongly points out something completely different from what you’ve just said. While it is ideal to be in a relationship where you don’t have conflicting values; clear, kind and honest communication goes a long way to preventing you from sabotaging your relationship.

2. Respect Each Other’s Boundaries

Like values, boundaries need to be clearly defined and articulated. Some years ago, I had a client who told me that her husband always brought his friends to their house for drinks every Friday night, and his drunk and loud friends wouldn’t leave until 2:30am. That happened every single week. She was frustrated and upset. Further examination revealed that this client and her husband had different boundaries around their social life. She preferred more one-on-one time with her partner; however, an essential requirement for her husband was to spend time drinking with his friends. In her opinion, her husband would have been well-advised to take his friends somewhere else for drinks most weeks and maybe bring his friends to their house only twice a year. In contrast, her husband thought it was perfectly okay to bring his friends to their house every week. Neither of them was wrong. They just had different boundaries. Unresolved boundary issues need to be resolved, otherwise they can eventually lead to separation and divorce. The solution to this couple’s problem was to find a happy medium. For example, she could allow her husband to bring his friends to their house every 6 weeks, and her husband could go to his friends’ places on most Friday nights. In the end, my recommendation was that her husband and his friends took turns to host Friday night drinks each week. That worked out well for them, because it was an effective way to respect each other’s boundaries, thereby stopping each of them from sabotaging the relationship. It’s important to note here that each partner needs to spend time fulfilling their own needs. Depending too much on your partner for your happiness will eventually sabotage your relationship. This is because it puts pressure on your partner to be responsible for your happiness. Happiness is the result of your thoughts, words and actions so make sure you regularly indulge in pursuits which enhance your sense of self and develop you as a person.

3. Focus on the Qualities Your Partner Possesses That You Love

It’s too easy to indulge in negative thinking and to allow little annoyances to become the main point of focus in your relationship. This can become the start of the end and sabotage your relationship unless you take immediate steps to correct your focus. In terms of your partner, it’s miraculous to witness how the more you focus on the qualities they have that you love, the more these qualities come forward and the less you even notice the things that bug you about them. This is because there’s a part of your brain which makes you notice more of whatever you focus your attention on. You may have heard of the Law of Attraction; your Reticular Activating System is your brain’s biological equivalent. When you consistently acknowledge your partner’s positive qualities, he or she leans more in that direction due to the reward pathway being activated in their brain. In psychology, this is called positive reinforcement.((Very Well Mind: Positive Reinforcement and Operant Conditioning)) Dopamine and oxytocin are released in the brain’s reward pathway; these hormones naturally make us feel good which motivates us toward further similar actions to activate further rewards. If you would like your partner to do more of what you want, you can use positive reinforcement to make it happen (but please use this technique in an empowering way). For example, you really want your partner to go shopping with you. Sadly, that’s not his favorite activity. Next time he goes shopping with you, you can say this to him, “You know what, when we go to the shopping mall together, I feel really lucky because most men wouldn’t happily go shopping with their women. The fact that you are willing to have more shared experiences with me really turns me on.” Now what he has actually heard is: When he goes shopping with his lady, his lady is turned on by him. Every man wants to turn on his woman! From now on, he will more likely be happy to go shopping with you.((Matthew Hussey: Get the Guy: Use the Secrets of the Male Mind to Find, Attract and Keep Your Ideal Man)) The important thing to remember here, is to be honest and sincere with your positive reinforcement. We can always sense when a comment is forced, and as such it will sound false, have a negative effect and possibly sabotage your relationship. Remember that praise and appreciation are best expressed in the moment they are felt.

4. Eliminate Blame

There are many ways that blame can sneak into your relationship, however, it is usually in the way that we word things that makes it sound like we are blaming and therefore sabotaging our relationships. Saying things like, “Don’t waste money on books” rather than “Honey, since we need to save money for our house, I’d appreciate it if you could borrow books from the local library instead of buying books online.” In the example above, “don’t” is a negative word. Psychologists claim that our subconscious mind doesn’t understand the word “don’t”, although logically we know what it means. Consequently, that person’s partner receives this message: “buying books is wasting money and it has annoyed him, so he is blaming me.” No one likes being blamed, and being on the defensive makes it harder biologically for an individual to feel motivated to change their behavior. When you blame others, you give up your power to change. Blame and false accusations are at the crux of most relationship breakdown. Sometimes it seems easier to blame your partner than to take responsibility for your words and actions (or lack of them).((The Dating Directory: How to Be the Best Version of Yourself Part 1:3)) How many times have you been in an argument with your partner and felt like you were being falsely accused? Neither of you agree on what was said. You are both adamant that you are right and do your best to prove that your partner is wrong (to prove that you are right). Your voices rise as you struggle to feel heard, feel understood and to defend your stance. Our brains are complex and during a heated debate when we are triggered, our ancient emotional brain kicks in. This affects our short-term memory, our ability to hear, and our ability to communicate clearly. Because our cognitive processing is affected when we are emotionally triggered, we cannot accurately remember what was said and not said. When you argue, there are instances where both or you are wrong and both of you are right… but unless you recorded the argument, neither of you can prove who said what. Arguing your point and blaming your partner not only sabotages your relationship, due to how your brain works it is a complete waste of time. It’s better to admit that you could be wrong… because insisting that you are right and blaming your partner will sabotage your happiness as well as your relationship. As the old saying goes: it’s better to be happy than to be right.

5. Be Aware of the Importance of Intimacy

This is a topic that most people avoid talking about, but it’s one of the most significant topics in a relationship. In general, there are three pillars in a relationship: emotional connection, attraction alignment and intimacy. Therefore, as one major pillar in a relationship, intimacy is of vital importance. It is said that most couples make love frequently at the beginning of their relationships because that’s the honeymoon stage. Unfortunately, within three years, a lot of couples stop making love. This is sad, but true. Actually, it happens more often than you think. One in three couples suffer from intimacy problems. People just don’t want to talk about it either because of a religious upbringing, or because it’s become such a sensitive topic they don’t know how to approach it. Due to the nature of my work, I have helped many couples overcome their intimacy challenges. I’ve also helped many individuals overcome the grief and loneliness associated with losing their partner due to unresolved intimacy challenges. In other words, sexless marriages rarely last. We are not taught how to drive our bodies sexually. This often results in confusion and frustration for a person trying to complete the act. I do apologize if this statement isn’t the prettiest thing to say. However, many relationships fall apart due to intimacy challenges and if they aren’t addressed, reluctance on either or both partners to engage sexually will eventually result. A disappointing sex life often results in either partner having a low libido((Dr. Joe Today: 3 Practical Ways to Boost a Low Libido)) which leads to a sexless marriage… or no marriage at all. In order to maintain a healthy and sexy relationship, you must invest your time and energy in your pleasure. Dr Christiane Northrup, author of Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom states that pleasure is your birthright. How many times have you had random thoughts during sex that were unrelated to the sexual act? Or you’ve thought about your work, your business or your finances during sex? In which case, how does your brain know that you want your sexual programs activated? Not knowing how to be in charge of your biology can sabotage intimacy as well as your relationship. You are entitled to pleasure. But you also need to know how to balance your pleasure to stay in charge of your body sexually. Focusing on the wrong thing at the wrong time is the culprit of most intimacy issues and applies to both men and women. This can be easily rectified with the correct knowledge and technique. It’s exactly what we need to learn if we want to stop ourselves from sabotaging our relationships. Therefore, you are strongly recommended to seek professional advice if you need help in this regard. Don’t wait until your relationship is already falling apart.

The Bottom Line

Many people believe that they must switch off their emotional brain and switch on their logical brain in order to be successful. But ignoring the power of the emotional brain is a way to sabotage their relationships. While you cannot ignore your biology, you can learn how to harness it; mentally, emotionally and physically. To sum up, the above-mentioned strategies are high-leverage methods of stopping yourself from sabotaging relationships. Remember to incorporate these techniques in your relationship gradually, and you’ll benefit from them in record time.

More Articles About Relationships

• What Is a Relationship Timeline and Should You Follow It?
• How to Go Through Different Stages of Relationships and Keep the Peace
• How to Regain Broken Trust in a Relationship
• What You Really Need to Fix Insecurity in a Relationship Forever

13 Things to Put on Your Daily Checklist for Increased Productivity

Did you know that many C-level executives play computer games at work to "feel more productive"? It is ironical, but it's the truth today. People are using whatever they can to become (more) productive and daily checklists are just one of the things. But there is a good way and a bad way to create a daily checklist. One will super boost your productivity, the other one will be a mind-numbing task which you will stop doing in two days. To avoid the latter, I have devised only 13 things you need to have on your daily checklist to super boost your productivity and it starts with your morning routine. Whatever you do in life, you need to have a morning routine which is consistent. It is your anchor for starting the day and if you skip it, your entire day will be off track. There is a reason a phrase "start off the day on the wrong foot" persisted over millennia. I won't tell you what your morning routine should be because nobody can tell you that, but what I can tell you is that it should have certain elements and they are the following.

1. Sleep 8 Hours

You need to sleep for 8 hours. Period. There is a plethora of research which says that you need 8 hours of sleep to be productive and cognitively optimal during the day. But what is even scarier is that there is a ton of research done on the effects lack of sleep brings to people and the results are devastating. So if you want to be productive, sleep would be the first thing on your daily checklist.

2. Early Physical Activity

I don't mean an hour-long session in the gym. You can do that if that's your things, but by this, I mean simple stretching, maybe a 10-minute walk, or a short 5 to 7 minutes long exercise. You just need something to wake up your body and get the blood flow going. One example would be Tony Robbins who jumps into his pool and swims a couple of laps. Use whatever physical exercise works for you for as long as you need to wake up.

3. Eat Some (Healthy) Food

Food gets energy in your body early in the morning and wakes up your mind in a different way than exercise. You need food in the morning and I hope you will eat something healthy because that has the best benefits for your mind and for your body. There are multiple diets out there that tell you that their diet is the best diet. Try out a couple of different diets and stick with the one which suits you the best. Remember, the goal of the daily checklist is that only needs to work for a single person - for you.

4. Do Your Favorite Unproductive Activity

An unproductive activity in the morning in an article on daily productivity using a checklist? Yes, I understand the irony but remember the C-level executives? You Are Not A Robot. You are a human being and we need fun, unproductive, and lazy time. If you spend 10 to 20 minutes in the morning doing your favorite unproductive activity, you will settle down "the instant gratification monkey" everyone has inside of us.((Wait But Why: Why Procrastinators Procrastinate)) Once you're done with it, you will clear it from your mind and carry on. Some people watch YouTube, some play Minesweeper or BubbleSpinner (guilty...), but you can do whatever you like. That's why it's your favorite unproductive activity.

5. Personal Reflection Time

It's not necessarily meditation. Meditation is just one thing you can do for your personal reflection time. You can also spend a couple of minutes for yourself to center yourself for the upcoming day. Some people call it gratitude,((Benjamin Hardy, PhD: This 75-Year Harvard Study Shows How To Have Lifetime Joy)) but to me, it's just personal reflection time. I do this by walking toward my workplace while listening to music. It can be whatever works for your - a prayer, a minute of silence, sitting down in the car and doing nothing, etc.

6. A 10-Second Plan

Most people elaborate on their charts, sheets, daily plan through 7 different applications. And that's why it doesn't work. You are smart. But like, really smart. Otherwise, you wouldn't be reading this. You already know what the most important thing you have to do today is. If I gave you only 10 seconds right now to plan your day to be productive, that activity would be the only one in those 10 seconds. That is your plan for today. Do only that for today and your day will be productive. But that is easier said than done. I know. That's why we are only at the half of the article. All of these above were the things that you do when you're home or commuting. But now, let's go over the things you do when you get to work.

7. Get Yourself into a Working Frame by Reading

When they get to work, most people first sit down, open their browser and randomly scroll the internet for half an hour. But not you. You know better. You should sit down and open up a book or an article which is related to your field of work. This is really important. Once you read an article or a couple of pages of a book which is related to your field of work, your brain will put a focus on that information and it will start producing some marvelous ideas and solutions. The most important thing here is that it can't be scrolling over Facebook or Instagram. It needs to be something which puts your mind into the right field and working state. Before writing this article, I reread certain parts of Atul Gawande's Checklist Manifesto, Brendon Burchard's High Performance Habits, and Eric Barker's Barking Up The Wrong Tree. Put yourself into the right frame of mind and you're almost there.

8. Kill Distractions

Okay, if Jenny from the office is a distraction, don't literally kill her- it's just a phrase. But I used the word kill for a specific reason. You need to behave toward distractions in that kind of a way. Kill it wherever you deem possible. Put your front page on your browser to something which won't seduce you into procrastinating. Use headphones even if you don't listen to music because your colleagues will know that you mean business when they are on. Close the doors and shut the drapes. Turn off Wi-Fi on your phone. No distractions make you work - because there is nothing else to do and your brain is already in that state of mind. Take a look at these tips on How to Minimize Distraction to Get Things Done.

9. When Tired, Rest. Don't Quit!

Since I'm a writer, taking a nap in the middle of the day to rest is a possibility and almost a daily occurrence for me (sometimes I take a long walk instead). You will get tired during the day and when that happens, don't try to push through it. Simply stop working and go rest. The problem here is that nobody ever taught us how to rest and our culture looks at that as laziness. There is a major difference between the two, but the most important thing when resting is that you 100% rest. So no working, no thinking about working, and no working (I had to re-state that for some workaholics out there). I was writing an article which was a summary of every single personal development book I read in the past two years (90 books in total).((Growth Habits: How I Read 90 Books In The Past 2 Years By Reading 20 Pages A Day)) The article took me two months and 100+ hours to finish. But I learned to rest when I was tired, so I managed to finish it even though the size of it is comparable to a book. When tired, rest. Don't quit. When necessary, schedule downtime for yourself too.

10. Know When the Day Is Done

I've seen people who are super productive themselves, but they think that they are lazy and unproductive because there is always more you can do. That is the problem of not knowing when the day is done. Point 6 was "A 10-seconds plan." If you managed to finish that in the day, it was a productive day and the day is done. Nothing more, nothing less. You did the one thing you planned for the day. Don't torture yourself thinking that you need to work 16 hours a day to be productive. That's not productivity, that's torture. Stop when you're done and call it a day.

11. Track Your Day

This comes at the end of the article and the day because you need to check things off the daily checklist. By tracking your day, you realize what you did and didn't do for that day. After a couple of days of working everything from your checklist, the goal becomes not to "break the chain." This is something attributed to Jerry Seinfeld who, when asked how he became a great comedian, responded:

"I just wrote one joke a day and then tried not to break the chain on my calendar."

Track your daily checklist because you will grow a habit of doing it. You may want to make use of these apps to keep track of your day: 24 Best Habit Tracking Apps

12. Reward Yourself

The best thing after a productive day is the reward you get by being productive. Don't ignore this thing on your daily checklist. If you've done everything from the checklist, give yourself a proper reward for that. It will make your brain remember the activity as pleasurable and it will become easier for you to do it. Learn to celebrate small wins so you'll stay motivated and keep up the momentum.

13. What Got You Here, Won't Get You There

A checklist is a tool which you use; so understand that over time, your life, work, job, situation, and position will change. And alongside that, your daily checklist will change as well. Realize that the things which got you in this position doesn't necessarily have to be the things that will get you further along. Things change and your checklist should change accordingly.

The Bottom Line

You now have all the 13 things for your daily checklist which will make you super productive. Put it somewhere visible where it can look at you every single morning and every single evening. That will remind you to do the activities from the checklist. And if you keep doing it, eventually, it will bring you massive results. Every journey, no matter how long, always begins the same way - with a single step. You've already made two steps - you've read this article and learned what you need to have on your daily checklist. The third step is implementation and it's yours to make.

More Articles About Productive Habits

• Need Morning Motivation? 30 Morning Routines to Help You Start Afresh
• Powerful Daily Routine Examples for a Healthy and High-Achieving You
• The Ultimate Night Routine Guide: Sleep Better and Wake Up Productive
• 16 Everyday Habits of Highly Productive People

How to Develop a Can Do Attitude and Succeed in Whatever You Want

In life, attitude is everything. If you've got a negative attitude, it will taint your entire outlook on life and dramatically decrease your ability to succeed. With a negative attitude, you will make little (if any) progress on the goals and ambitions you set for yourself. Instead of consciously crafting a successful life, your negative disposition will often lead to a passive personality, one in which you shrug your shoulders and let life happen to you, rather than making things happen for you. If that's not the life you imagined for yourself, then it's time to transform your current attitude into a can do attitude. Here are some powerful and practical ideas you can start using today to make that attitude shift and start an upward cycle of success for yourself that will reverberate into every area of your life.

1. Starts with Your Mindset

Since the early days of boxing, experts relied on what they called the “tales of the tape” to predict how successful an athlete’s boxing career may or may-not be. These "tales of the tape" were a series of physical measurements that included the fighter’s fist, reach, chest expansion and weight. Experts thought these measurements could predict which athletes would be most successful in the ring based on how their numbers shook-out against these measurements. But get this: did you know Muhammad Ali—hailed as one of the greatest boxers of all time—failed every single one of his measurements? The so-called "experts" called him a failure. They didn't believe he had the skills and talents to succeed. As Dr. Carol Dweck explains in her book, Mindset, Muhammad Ali “was not a natural.” Not by a long shot—at least according to the boxing experts of that era. But nonetheless, against all odds, Ali went down in history as one of the greatest boxers of all time. What exactly was it about Ali that contributed to his incredible success in boxing? What made him "the greatest," as he often proclaimed? It wasn't his brawn. It was his brain. Author Carol Dweck explains Ali’s success as follows:

“[Muhammad Ali] was not a natural. He had great speed but he didn’t have the physique of a great fighter, he didn’t have the strength, and he didn’t have the classical moves. In fact, he boxed all wrong. He didn’t block punches with his arms and elbows. He punched in rallies like an amateur. He kept his jaw exposed. He pulled back his torso to evade the impact of oncoming punches, which Jose Torres [former colleague of Ali] said was ‘like someone in the middle of a train tack trying to avoid being hit by an oncoming train, not by moving to one or the other side of the track, but by running backwards.’”

Throughout his career, he was constantly matched with athletes that were bigger, stronger and faster than himself. But he beat them anyway. It wasn't his physical talent or skill that helped him do succeed over and over again. It was his mental attitude. His can-do attitude to be more precise. This leads me to believe that in many cases, the critical factor between someone who achieves success vs someone who does not, comes down in large part to your mindset. Our mindset determines the way we deal with tough situations and setbacks as well as our willingness to deal with and improve ourselves. A person with a growth-mindset automatically has a can-do attitude because they don't give up when they fail. Instead, they use failure as a learning opportunity that does nothing more than get them closer to success. Ali helps us understand that developing a growth mindset—and by association, a can-do attitude—is about rising strong regardless of how lackluster his physical endowments may have been. Instead of looking in the mirror and saying, “I’m not good enough to be a champion;” instead he said, “I’m going to use a different path to achieve greatness.” And that's what he did. He showed everyone that success comes first from the gem between your ears. The same gem that chooses to leave behind negative beliefs and replace them with an attitude that says, "I can do this."

2. Focus on Being Congruent

“While some researchers and clinicians argue that you can change your life by just changing your thoughts, actions, or feelings, I have seen no evidence in my research that real transformation happens until we address all three as equally important parts of a whole, parts that are inextricably connected to one another, like a three-legged stool.” —Brene Brown, from Rising Strong

Your thoughts + actions + feelings are like a three-legged stool. This is similar to people that follow the old self-help advice to just “think positive.” If we THINK positive, but we still FEEL negative, then how will we ACT? Positive thinking is powerful, but only when we think of it as one of the three necessary legs that reinforces the stool we’re sitting on. If we don’t want the stool to wobble or break, we’ve got to make sure we give each leg the care it needs to keep us from falling down and getting hurt. I believe that the key here, with this idea, is to focus on being as congruent as possible. What’s the best way to do that? Here's how: 1. Remember that the way you think needs to be in alignment with the way you act. When you affirm powerful thoughts to yourself about what you can do rather than what you cannot do, your biochemistry will change for the better. You will stand taller. You will move with confidence. 2. Understand that the way you act is going to have an impact on the way you feel. When you tell yourself that you can do something over and over again, your mind will begin to believe it and accept it as the truth. This, in return, will make you feel like a winner, like a success. 3. Realize the way you feel is going to help reinforce the way you think. The way you feel right now has a lot to do with how you're carrying yourself... Are you hunching forward? Are you slouching in your seat? Are your shoulders sloped? If yes, you probably don't feel like you're at your best. Now, straighten out your back, tilt your chest upward, and smile (even if you've got no reason to!) Not only will you notice a shift in the way you feel when you do this, but you'll notice a shift in the way you think as well. You'll go from thinking thoughts that lead to feeling stressed and depressed, to thinking and feeling confident and creative. In short: you'll have that can-do attitude that leads to the success you crave in life. Which is going to circle right back around into helping you decide the way you choose to act in any given situation. See the feedback loop these three end up creating? Bottom line? It’s not about positive thinking alone that drives our success in life — it’s about being in positive congruence between the way we think, act, and feel that drives our success in life.

3. Be Mindful of Your Self-Talk

Your self-worth depends upon your self-talk. An all-star baseball player once decided to visit a prison to inspire the inmates to better themselves. He told them a story about how his father always encouraged him when he was a little boy. His dad always told him, “son, if you keep on hittin’ the ball like that, you’ll end up in the MLB one day.” Sure enough, he ended up playing professional baseball. Upon hearing this story, one of the prisoners stood up and said, “hey, my dad told me something similar when I was a little boy. Every time I did something my dad didn’t like, he looked at me and said, ‘son, if you keep on mis-behaving like this, you’ll end up in prison one day.” Sure enough, he ended up in prison. As it turns out, 90% of male prisoners were treated like dirt by their parents when they were children. Many of them were spoken to like they were prisoners WAY before they ended up behind bars. Now, obviously this doesn’t mean that our parents determine the future for us in advance. We all have the ability to respond to our circumstances however we want.((Meaningful GQ: Respond Rather Than React)) But it certainly makes things a lot easier if we have a solid foundation to build upon. Regardless of how your parents spoke to you though, the take-away from this story is very simple: the way we speak with ourselves plays a massive role in the way we perceive ourselves. And the way we perceive ourselves plays a massive role in our ability to develop a can-do attitude, and reap the rewards it affords. Our attitude goes a long way towards determining whether we decide to take on challenges and pursue success in the face of adversity. Encourage yourself. Believe that you can do it—whatever it may be. Your self-talk plays a huge role in your self-image. Your self-image plays a huge role in your attitude. Your attitude plays a huge role in your ability to succeed in the various endeavors you decide to pursue in your life. Drop whatever limiting attitudes you're holding on to about yourself and replace t hem with a strong, self-starting can-do attitude.

4. Become an Activationist

“Excellent ideas are not enough. An only fair idea acted upon, and developed, is 100 percent better than a terrific idea that dies because it isn’t followed up.” —David Schwartz, The Magic of Thinking Big

Plenty of people have excellent ideas, but only a select few are able to see their idea through to action. There are two types of people on the planet: “activationists” and “passivationists.” Activationists come up with ideas and execute them without hesitation—the embodiment of a "can-do" attitude. When these folks decide to take a vacation, they take it. When they decide to call a client, an old friend, or even a potential romantic interest—they do it. Activationists decide to become successful and they will that decision into reality with a can-do attitude. Passivationists on the other hand, might have just as many ideas as an activationist, but the passivationist executes none of them. They postpone and procrastinate their dreams and goals continually. This lack of action - this lack of success - is the result of having a passive mentality about life and neglecting to cultivate a can-do attitude. So, what can we do to break ourselves of the passivationist habit? We can start by breaking the habit of perfectionism. Perfectionists put things off because they fear doing something wrong. However, the activationist goes ahead and does things, and then deals with any problems that arise along the way. This also includes waiting for the “perfect” time to do something. There is no perfect time, and every minute that you wait makes it that much more likely that you will chicken out of the whole thing. Now is the magic word of achievement. It's time to get rid of tomorrows, laters, and sometimes—and replace them with the readiness and urgency of a can-do attitude.

You Can Do This!

Here's a quick recap of what we've gone over in this article. 1. It all starts with your mindset. If you want to achieve success in all dimensions of your life, you'll need to get your mental game in check. Ensure you're mindset is directed towards growth and progress for most of your waking hours. 2. Positive thinking can only get you so far. To generate true change, to develop a real can-do attitude that helps you succeed in whatever endeavor you want, you will need to place equal importance on your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Treat them parts of yourself that are achieve their peak power and potential when they are unified and treated with equal importance. In other words: we cannot simply "positively think" our way to success. We must combine those positive thoughts with forward-facing action. 3. Your self-worth depends upon your self-talk. Repeatedly affirm to yourself that you have a can-do attitude. Look yourself in the mirror and literally say it out loud, "I have a can-do attitude! I have a can-do attitude! I have a can-do attitude!" Do this exercise every morning after you brush your teeth. Yes, this will absolutely feel silly at first, but you will find that the benefits of success far outweigh the momentary feelings of embarrassment or self-consciousness you experience as a result of doing this. 4. Become an activationist. Do not allow fear to freeze you in place and prevent you from achieving your dreams. Embody the habits of an activationist and take consistent action until you achieve what you set out to achieve. With each achievement, you will find your self-confidence getting stronger and stronger. This then, will lead to more action, which will lead to more success... ... And this cycle of success? It never needs to stop.

More Articles to Build a Positive Attitude

• How to Start Living Your Life Above Limitations
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• Transform Your Attitude for Success with These 16 Killer Techniques
• Positive Motivation vs Negative Motivation: Which One Is Better?

How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

I am a huge proponent of the power of communication. Effective communication can make nearly every phase of your life better. Strong communication skills will help you succeed in business and will positively impact your personal relationships. On the other hand, poor communication can lead to a wide variety of challenges in all of your relationships. It's a skill that can have a profound influence on nearly every phase of your life. While you might not immediately think of listening as a key component to communication, it really is. Half of all communication is listening. To be a really good communicator, you have to learn how to truly listen. I can show you how. Follow along to find out how to practice active listening, I will share with you a step by step guide.

What Is Active Listening?

Let's start with a definition of active listening. Active listening, like you might guess, means that you are actively listening to the person that is speaking. It means really paying attention to the person as they are talking to you. This is different that the passive hearing that is done in many conversations. Active listening involves using many of your senses to listen to the person. It also means giving the person your full attention. You need to show the other person that you are truly listening to them, your body language will convey this to the person that is talking to you. Think of it as your ears truly hearing, your brain thoroughly processing, and the rest of your body showing that you are fully present in the moment and engaged on what is being said. This is a good way to visualize active listening.

The Importance of Active Listening

Before we dive into the nuts and bolts of how to practice active listening, let's first look at why active listening is important. If you agree that being a good communicator will have great benefits in all of your relationships, then you most likely agree that listening is an important part of communication. And it is. Here's a few reasons why it's well worth practicing active listening whenever possible:

Builds Mutual Trust

When someone sees that you are actively listening, they immediately think that you care about what they are saying. It's well known that most of us gain great satisfaction from being understood. It's one of those things that just makes us feel good. When you are showing someone that you are very interested in what they are saying, they can't help but feel like you are seeking to understand them. This in turn greatly affects how much they feel they can trust you.

Boost Self Confidence

People who are good at active listening tend to have higher self esteem and a higher self image. This is because they are skilled at working towards establishing and building strong, positive relationships. People who do this on a regular basis tend to feel confident in their abilities.

Fewer Mistakes and Less Miscommunication

As you might imagine, if you are practicing active listening, you actually catch lots of details and nuances you might otherwise miss. If you are simply waiting for someone to finish speaking so you can open your mouth, you are only paying partial attention. And this is a sure fire way to miss some important points. When you actively listen to someone, you will catch many details and subtleties you might otherwise miss.

Improved Productivity

Imagine you are assigned a project. Now imagine the person who assigned you the project clearly articulates the entire project from start to finish. Then imagine that person actively listening to your responses and clarifying any questions you might have. As you walk out of that meeting, you have a crystal clear picture of what you need to deliver and how you are going to do it. Isn't that a nice feeling? Having someone actively listen to you and clearly communicate will make a world of difference in how productive you are in accomplishing that project. You have a clear road map to get to your destination in a successful manner.

Fewer Arguments

Remember one of the greatest satisfactions we all have is feeling understood. This is very relevant here. One of the biggest reasons why arguments tend to escalate is due to a lack of understanding. When we feel someone is truly listening to us, we feel much more understood. And when we feel understood, we trust the other person more and tend to argue less. It becomes much easier to get to a good solution for everyone. Now, let's look at how to practice active listening.

How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

Here are the steps to being an active listener. This list may seem a little extensive and truthfully, it is kind of long. Don't think of it as a checklist that you have to mark off each point as you accomplish it. Rather, view it as a general guideline. If you can accomplish most of these in important conversations, you are on your way to becoming an active listener!

1. Maintain Eye Contact

You don't have to be laser focused on someone's eyes with your own. You do, however, have to maintain regular eye contact with them. This is really more for you than for them. When you maintain regular eye contact, you are forced to pay attention to that person. It's less easier to get distracted. It also conveys to the other person that you care enough about what's being said that you are looking at them while they speak.

2. Don't Fidget Too Much

Look, re-arranging and getting comfortable from time to time is fine. What's not fine is constantly playing with a pen or picking up your phone or looking all over the place. Being fidgety gives the impression that you aren't interested in what the other person is saying.

3. No Interrupting

Now this isn't a hard and fast rule. If you need to get clarification on a certain point, it's okay to ask politely. What you don't want to be doing is interrupting someone every other sentence to make your own point. Or to add your own color into the conversation. What you are supposed to be doing is listening, not talking.

4. Watch the Non Verbal Clues

Much of communication happens in a non-verbal manner. That means you can pick up a lot of what a person is communicating to you through their body language and not the actual words coming out of their mouths. Watch the non verbal clues that the other person is giving off while speaking. If they are uncomfortable, they might fidget. If they are nervous, they may not look you in the eye. These types of non verbal clues can help you hone in on how the other person is feeling.

5. Restate and Clarify

Sometimes when someone is speaking to us, it's not as clear as we'd like. When needed, restate what the other person has said and don't be afraid to clarify. You can say things like "To make sure I understand what I am hearing you say is ..... is that correct?". Also, saying something like "So what I am hearing is ..... and". This gives the other person an opportunity to ensure they are telling you everything they need to. It also shows that you care enough to ask a question to make sure you understand.

6. Use Some Encouragers

When someone has a hard time getting through everything, it's okay to provide some light encouragement here and there to get them to continue speaking or sharing more details. You don't want to rush into it but when someone seems to be in the middle of telling a story and comes to a halt, you can say something short like "and then" or "what happened next" or "did Bob have a response to that". Nothing that is going to take over the conversation but small pieces of encouragement here and there as needed.

7. Probing

It's perfectly fine to probe for more information when needed. Remember that your goal isn't to take over the conversation, it's to actively listen to the other person. Now when you feel there could be more relevant information that hasn't come out yet, it's fine to ask a few probing questions. Asking things such as "how did that make you feel" or "what do you think is the best way to handle that situation" are good ways to get the other person to share more about how they feel. This helps you understand the situation better.

8. Minimal Talking

I've hinted at it numerous times during the step by step process to active listening but, it's worth its own bullet point. Remember, to be an active listener, you should listen. You are seeking to really listen and understand the other person. Your role here is not to talk much. I can certainly have a hard time keeping my mouth shut when I have something to add. I have to take an inward deep breath, pause, and keep my mouth shut. I then ensure I am focused on what the other person is telling me. Being an active listener means listening with minimal talking.

9. Validate

Going back to how we all seek to be understood, it's a good idea to validate the other person. Saying things such as "I understand how that would upset you" and "I probably would have reacted the same way" makes the other person feel like you are on their side. Like you empathize with them and understand them. This again will help form trust in the conversation and in the relationship. Validating someone is huge.

The Bottom Line

There you have it. A step by step guide on how to practice active listening. Strong communication skills will help you in every relationship in your life. This includes work and personal relationships. If you can develop active listening skills, you will give your communication skills a huge boost. Listening is half of all communication. Do yourself a favor and work on your active listening skills. It can have a dramatic impact on the success you have at work and in your close personal relationships.

More Articles About Communication Skills

• How to Master Effective Communication Skills at Work and Home
• 13 Powerful Listening Skills to Improve Your Life at Work and at Home
• How to Work with Different Communication Styles in the Office
• The Purpose of Listening: To Understand, Not Reply
• Conflict Management Styles for Effective Communication at Work

How to Raise a Confident Child with Grit

My husband and I facilitate a couple's marriage and parenting group. Recently, the group discussed qualities, characteristics, and traits we wanted to see our children develop as they grow up. One term that came up that all parents seemed to upon agree as a highly valued trait was that of grit. The question from our group was: "Can grit be taught to our children?" The answer is, yes. Parents can help their child develop grit. What is grit? Dr. Angela Duckworth is the top researcher on this subject and wrote the book Grit. She defines grit as "passion and perseverance for long term goals". This new buzz word is popular in the adult realm, but what about our developing children? What if we could help our children develop grit as young children. Grit is more crucial to success than IQ. Duckworth, through her research at Harvard, found that having grit was a better predictor for an individual's success than IQ. This means having the smartest kid in the room doesn't ensure any level of success in their future. They can be brilliant, but if they aren't properly intrinsically motivated, they won't be successful. Grit determines long term success. If a child can't pick themselves up and try again after a failure, then how are they going to be able to do it as adult? What a gift it would be to our children to engage them in a manner that helps them recognize their passions, talents, and develop a persevere to purse their goals. Below are some tips on how to raise a confident child with grit.

1. Encouragement is Key

When a child wants to learn how to ride a bike, do they keep going after they fall down or do they quit after the first fall? If they aren't encouraged to get up and try again, and instead are coddled and told they can try again some other day, then they are being taught to play it safe. Safe and coddled don't exactly go hand-in-hand with building up grit. The child needs to be encouraged to try again. This can be a parent saying "you can do it, I believe in you" and "I know that even if you fall again you will try again and eventually you will get the hang of it". Encouragement to keep trying so that they can build up perseverance is very helpful in building a child's confidence. This confidence is what will help them strike out and try again. If they feel that they can't do it or shouldn't do it, then they won't. The mind is a powerful thing. If a child believes that they can't be successful in doing something, then they won't be successful. Part of building that mentality of believing in themselves comes from encouragement from their parents, care givers, and teachers.

Cheer Them On

How many times have you heard a story of success that someone had in life that all began because someone believed in that person? A coach, a mom, a teacher can have a huge impact by believing in the child's ability to be successful and voicing that encouragement to them. Words are powerful. Use them to build up a child, by telling them that they can do it even if they have try again and again. Be their support system by being their cheerleader. Cheerleaders don't just cheer when the team is winning. They cheer words of encouragement to keep the team going. The same goes with children. We need to cheer for their successes, but also cheer for them to keep going and fighting the fight when life gets tough!

You Can't Force Them

Keep in mind that you can't force a child to keep trying. They have to do it themselves. For example, when my daughter was learning to tie her shoes, it was a real struggle. She gave up. I couldn't make her want to try to do it again. She had to take a break from the struggle for a few months and then try again. She was more successful the second time around, because she had matured and her fine motor skills had improved. It would have been ridiculous for me to force her to practice tying her shoes for the three or four months in between, with tears and arguing taking place. No, instead we took a break. She tried again later. Forcing her to learn something that she wasn't ready to learn would have pit us against one another. That would have been a poor parenting move. There are boundaries that parents can set though in some cases. For example, if your child begins an activity and wants to quit mid-season because they are terrible at the sport, you have the opportunity to keep them in the sport through the end of the season to show them that quitting is not an option. Although they may not win another tennis match the rest of the season or win another swimming race all year long, finishing the commitment is important. It will help with the development of grit by teaching them to persevere through the defeat. It is character building. If your child is great at all things all the time, they will not develop grit. They need to try things that challenge them. When they aren't the best at something, or for that matter, the worst, it creates an opportunity for them feel real struggle. Real struggle builds real character.

2. Get Them out of Their Comfort Zone

My daughter wanted to try cheerleading this past fall. She has never done this activity in the past, nor is she particularly coordinated (sorry sweetie). For that matter, she couldn't even do a cartwheel when cheer season began. However, we signed up because she was so excited to become a cheerleader. I signed up to coach because there was a need for more cheer coaches. We were all-in at that point. Once the season began, I quickly realized that cheerleading was far outside my daughter's comfort zone. The idea of cheerleading was great in her mind. The reality of memorizing cheers and learning physical skills that were hard for her made the experience a struggle. She wanted to quit. I said to her "no, you were the one who wanted to do this, so we finish what we started." I had to say this more than once. I don't think anyone on the squad knew this was the case, because she kept at it. She kept practicing those cheers every evening. It did not come naturally to her at first, so it was uncomfortable. She always seemed to be half a beat behind the other cheerleaders, which made it very awkward and uncomfortable for her. However, letting her know that quitting mid-season was not an option made her try harder. She wanted to learn the cheers so she wouldn't stand out on the squad as the girl who didn't know what she is doing. By the end of the season, she became a decent cheerleader. Not the best, but she was no longer half a beat behind the rest. She learned skills that were hard for her to conquer. Now that she felt success in achieving something that was uncomfortable and hard for her. She knows she has it in her to do that in other areas of life. That is why it's ok for us as parents to let our kids feel the struggle and be uncomfortable. If they don't experience it when they are young, they will as adults, but they won't be equipped with the perseverance and inner-strength built from years of working hard through smaller struggles as they grew up. Allowing our children to struggle helps them build that skill of perseverance, so that they have the grit to achieve hard things in life that they really desire to accomplish.

3. Allow Them To Fail

Your child will fail at things in life. Let them. Do not swoop in and rescue your child from their personal failures. If they don't fail, then they don't have the opportunity to pick themselves up and try again. If I had pulled my daughter from cheerleader once I realized that it was going to be a real struggle, she wouldn't have experienced failure and struggle. Letting her have this small failure in life taught her lessons that can't be taught in a classroom. She learned about the power she has within herself to try harder, to practice in order to make change happen, and to push through it even when you feel like giving up because it is embarrassing. Failure is embarrassing. Learning to handle embarrassment is taking on a fear. When kids learn to do this at a young age, it is practice for adult life. They will experience failure as an adult. They will be better equipped to handle life's disappointments and failures if they have learned to handle the fear of embarrassment and failure when they are young. Practice builds up the skill. Processing and handling fear, embarrassment, and failure are skills. If I had pulled my daughter from cheer and allowed her to quit, I would have taken from her the opportunity to learn how to process and handle the embarrassment and failure she was experiencing at each practice and games. She learned to keep trying and that practicing the skills would lessen the embarrassment and feelings of failure. Learning the value of practice and how to preserve through the fear and failure are priceless lessons. We may want to rescue our children because we want them to be successful at the things that they do, but how will they be successful in this competitive world as adults if they are provided with only opportunities in which they succeed? Failure is needed to learn to thrive. Success in adulthood does not come easy to children who are protected from failure because they haven't built up the ability to persevere. Perseverance comes when they have learned time and time again how to take the fear of embarrassment and failure head on and practice to get better.

4. Teach Them to Try Again

Encourage your child to try again. Don't let them quit on the first try. Life is hard. If we quit the first time we tried at things, we would never amount to anything in life. We need to teach our children that trying again is simply part of life. Help them to give it a go by providing encouragement and support. Offer to practice with them, provide them with tutoring or coaching if necessary -- whatever it takes to get them back on the proverbial horse and trying again.

Break it Down

Sometimes failure occurs because they are trying something all at one time and they haven't mastered the smaller components. For example, a math student isn't going to jump into calculus as their first high school math course. No, of course not. They build on their skills. They begin with basic math, then algebra, geometry, trigonometry, and pre-calculus to then they get to the calculus level. If they are thrown into the deep end by taking on calculus before the foundation of their math skills are built, they will fail. Help your child try again by breaking down what it is they are trying to achieve. Going back to my cheer example... my daughter was not the best at learning the cheers when we began. It then dawned on me that we needed to break down each cheer phrase by phrase. Once we learned the phrase and movements that went with it, we could then learn the next one. Once these were learned, we could combine the phrases, practice them together, and then try to move to learn the next phrase in the cheer. It was a tedious process, but it worked. Not all skills come easy for kids. Helping them learn the skill of breaking things down into manageable tasks is another way we teach them about grit. They are learning to build skills by persisting, practicing, and building upon previous experience, knowledge, and skills. Grit is put into practice in childhood when they learn how to break down large tasks into smaller achievable tasks in order to build toward a greater goal.

5. Let Them Find Their Passion

Your child may be a wonderful pianist. However, if they aren't passionate about the skill, then they likely won't be happy or fulfilled in becoming a concert pianist. It's great to help your child discover their talents, but also let them discover what they are passionate about in life. True success will come because they are passionate about the activity, not because they are the best. The best usually become that way because they are passionate first. Therefore, let your child experience a variety of activities and interests so that they can discover what they love to do.

6. Praise Their Efforts, Not the Outcome

Praising their efforts keeps them motivated and trying. If you focus on outcome, then when they fail, they will become defeated and discouraged. Focusing on the fact that they tried hard and pointing out specific ways that they did well in terms of effort will support them in trying again. When you make a habit of focusing on outcome, then failures are avoided at all costs, including taking risks. Risks are needed in order to become successful. Therefore, make a habit of praising their efforts, even when the outcome is not what they had hoped and tried for, because eventually, if they keep trying their efforts will result in success.

7. Be a Model of Grit

If you are a parent or a caregiver for a child, then you are a model to that child. Children naturally look up to the adults in their life that are closest to them, especially their parents. They will look at your ability to persevere and achieve. Your grit will show. Your children are watching. They may not know the term grit, but they will learn about working hard, not giving up, trying again after failure, and all that grit entails from your actions. How you handle life is being watched by your children. You can work on your own grit by reading Angela Duckworth's book Grit .

Develop a Growth Mindset

Helping your child develop a growth mindset is also helpful to your child in their development of grit. Dr. Dweck, author of Growth Mindset and researcher at Stanford, developed a theory of fixed versus growth mindset. Basically, what it means is that if you have a fixed mindset, you will fear failure and easily give up. Someone with a growth mindset believes that their talents, skills, and abilities can be improved with hard work and learning. Parents and caregivers can help with the development of a growth mindset. Some of the ways that a growth mindset can be developed include:

• Teaching your child how the brain works: neuron connections, right brain versus left brain.
• Teach them to set goals.
• Teach them to have a "can do" attitude.
• Teach them to develop a strategy when they want to achieve something.
• Teach them that mistakes are an opportunity to learn.
• Teach them that failure is a normal part of life.
• Teach them about self talk: Self Talk Determines Your Success

There are a great deal of activities and materials online for helping your child develop a growth mindset including these resources below (each site contains at least some free content):

• Proud To Be Primary: Growth Mindset Activities
• Big Life Journal: Growth Mindset Kids Activities
• Bits of Positivity: The Ultimate List of Free Growth Mindset Printable

The Bottom Line

Grit is not just for adults, it is something we can help our children develop. Grit is more critical to success than IQ, so we should be helping our children develop this quality early in life. As a parent, being a model of grit, is one of the first ways to help our children become "gritty".

8 Essential Vitamins And Minerals to Help You Sleep Better

If you are like most people, you probably can resonate with some bits of it: You start the day off feeling pretty good after a cup of coffee. You get through the morning - maybe you catch a quick lunch workout, then around 2 or 4pm, you hit a slump. You feel like you could spend 4 hours in the staff nap room, but you know you have 24 more emails to get through before you can even begin to start winding down your workday. You promise yourself you'll go to bed early, and if you wake up you won't stare at your phone until the wee hours of the morning. You have another cup of coffee on the drive home from work, start dinner, sit with the kids and family, load the dishwasher, and still have to put together the summary of a presentation for tomorrow morning. You feel more tired and overwhelmed, so you catch an episode of your favorite show and spend an hour wrapping up your presentation only to find its 10:30pm and you are exhausted. You go to bed, but you just haven't had the time to wind down so you lie there looking at the ceiling, listening to your partner snore like a chainsaw. When you do finally get to sleep, you wake up four hours later in the wee hours of the morning, and can't get back to sleep... You're tired, so why can't you go back to sleep? Sometimes, our bodily sleep cycles get a little mixed up due to the poor nutritional choices we make in our day to day lives. We eat fast food on the run and miss out on important nutrients our bodies need to function properly and run smoothly. A body can only function properly for so long with an improper diet then at some point something has got to give. This article will show you 8 vitamins, minerals and supplements to help you get a better sleep and increase your energy and productivity to help you look and feel your best! A Word of Caution: It is always important to talk to your doctor or pharmacist prior to using vitamins for sleep or adding supplements to your diet, as some of them you can overload on – such as iron, and the fat soluble Vitamins A, D E & K. A doctor, pharmacist or dietician can give you specific advice about how much of any supplement you may need as some supplements are not suitable for people who are pregnant, breastfeeding or have certain medical disorders.

1. Vitamin D

Most experts agree that Vitamin D isn't actually a vitamin but rather, a hormone made in the body with the help of sunlight. In a meta-analysis published by the National Center for Biotechnology Information, it was found that Vitamin D deficiency is in fact associated with a higher risk of sleep disorders and that with less than 20 ng/mL Vitamin D could increase the risk of sleep disorders.((Nutrients: The Association Between Vitamin D Deficiency and Sleep Disorders: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis.)) You can get Vitamin D from supplementation, and sunlight! Some foods high in Vitamin D are eggs, salmon, tuna fish, and mushrooms. Check with your doctor or pharmacist to see what your current Vitamin D level is and how much you should be supplementing. Because Vitamin D is a fat soluble vitamin, it can get stored in your body and become toxic if the level is too high. Want to know how much sunlight is safe and when to get it to produce your own Vitamin d? This app maybe able to help.

2. Vitamin E

A 2011 study looking at the neuroprotective effect of Vitamin E showed that Vitamin E can prevent sleep deprivation-induced memory impairment, as well as normalizing hippocampus antioxidant mechanisms during sleep deprivation.((Science Direct: The neuroprotective effect of Vitamin E on chronic sleep deprivation-induced memory impairment: The role of oxidative stress.)) In addition to this, Vitamin E is a powerful antioxidant – protecting the body tissue from free radical damage, and playing a role in healthy aging. It also helps to keep the immune system strong, is important in the formation of red blood cells and helps the body use Vitamin K. Sunflower seeds, almonds, and wheat germ oil are foods that contain Vitamin E in relatively decent amounts. You can also buy it in capsule form at most pharmacies. Vitamin E is another of the fat-soluble vitamins, so check in with your doctor or pharmacist to assess your needs.

3. B Vitamins

There are 8 B Vitamins that are vital to your health which together are called the B -complex Vitamins. Some emerging research shows that certain B-Vitamins – B3, B5, B6, B9 & B12 to be exact – help regulate the body’s supply of Tryptophan, which in turn helps the body produce melatonin. Melatonin is a hormone produced in your body to make you sleepy. (More on Tryptophan and Melatonin later). The B-Vitamins are typically included in most multivitamins, or you can purchase B-Complex on its own in supplement form. A healthy, well rounded diet with plenty of whole grains, meats, fruit and veggies often provides a good base amount for the body.

4. Calcium & Magnesium

These two minerals are often recommended together just before bed as they both play a role in muscle contraction and relaxation. It is believed that a lack of Calcium and Magnesium can cause numerous sleep interruptions throughout the night, and Calcium works with Tryptophan (another hormone involved in sleepiness) to produce Melatonin which helps induce sleep. Chronic insomnia is also one of the initial symptoms of Magnesium deficiency. A diet rich in greens, nuts and seeds will ensure you get Magnesium and Calcium as well as you can buy a supplement containing both at any pharmacy.

5. Theanine

Theanine is an amazing amino acid that is found in tea leaves – particularly green tea - and some types of mushrooms. Theanine boosts some of the chemicals in the brain (such as dopamine, GABA, and serotonin) which help to regulate sleep. It also lowers chemicals in the brain that have an excitatory effect. Experts believe it helps induce sleepiness and speed up the time it takes to fall asleep as well as improving sleep quality.((Medical News Today: Does L-Theanine Have Health Benefits?)) As mentioned, you can get Theanine from green tea. However, you can also find it in supplement form at many pharmacies.

6. Iron

The number one symptom of low Iron levels is fatigue and sleep disturbance. Low iron levels are thought to be a major risk factor in Restless Leg Syndrome, which can cause sleeplessness or insomnia. Low iron can also contribute to feelings of anxiety which can make sleep tough as well. Have your doctor check your iron levels. If you are low, they will recommend a supplement. Did you know that your body absorbs 2 to 3 times more iron from animal sources than from plant sources? Hack: Vitamin C helps your body absorb Iron, so try taking any recommended supplements with apple or orange juice! The following foods are high in iron: Lean beef, oysters, chicken, turkey, beans and lentils, tofu, baked potatoes, cashews, dark green leafy vegetables such as spinach, fortified breakfast cereals, whole-grain and enriched breads.

7. Melatonin

Melatonin is a hormone naturally produced by the body, which makes you feel sleepy. If you are having trouble getting to sleep, you can also find it in supplement form and typically taking it for a short period (two weeks or so) can help reset your circadian rhythm and let you fall asleep faster. Experts recommend trying it for a short period then stopping supplementation and seeing how your body has responded. You can help melatonin do its job by “setting the mood”. Turn the lights low, shut off screens, and get cozy. And if you still have trouble getting to sleep, you can find its supplement at almost any pharmacy.

8. Tryptophan

You know how after Thanksgiving dinner, everyone heads for the recliner or couch and falls asleep? Studies have shown over and over again that tryptophan can induce sleepiness and help you fall asleep faster. You can buy tryptophan supplements at most pharmacies. You can also get it from many foods such as: nuts, seeds, poultry (not just turkey), milk, spinach, eggs and salmon.

Conclusion

Healthy sleep is imperative for overall bodily health, yet it is not uncommon to experience sleep issues at different times in your life - for many different reasons. Whether it is stress, or hormone related or otherwise, there are many things that can assist you to improve your sleep.

More Articles About Sleep

• The Importance of Sleep Cycles on Productivity (+ Tips to Improve Yours)
• How to Build a Good Bedtime Routine That Makes Your Morning Easier
• The Ultimate Night Routine Guide: Sleep Better and Wake Up Productive
• How to Practice Guided Meditation for Sleep to Calm the Mind