Do you have key people in your life that influence your success? You know, those like-minded people who inspire you to be, do, or have more in your life and career - do you have those? If you answered no, why is that? Because the reality is, if you go and talk to any highly successful person, you’ll likely find that they’ve got several people like that in their lives. So, it’s clearly important. However, although we know it’s important to connect with like-minded people, doing it is a separate issue. Perhaps you’re not sure where to start or exactly how to do it. I’m going to share with you why connecting with like-minded people is so important, as well as 3 tips on how to do it in fun and effective ways.
Why Is Connecting With Like-Minded People Important?
Tony Robbins frequently talks about how
“success leaves clues.” What he’s referencing in that statement is the fact that if you want to be successful, you should model those who are already where you want to be. And you know what? He’s right. Success is not an independent journey. We’ve all had to rely on others to get us to where we are, and we will continue to have to lean on others, in some way, shape, or form, to get to where we want to go. Now, if having role models in life can impact your success, imagine actually having a relationship with them. As the old African Proverb says,
“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”
Connection breeds confidence, and confidence breeds results. Therefore, your ability to surround yourself with people who motivate, inspire, and hold you accountable is important to your success. We can see this by the growth of the
mastermind group concept and people collaborating together. There’s no disputing the importance of connecting with like-minded people. So, if you’re on the bandwagon and are ready to connect with others who will inspire you, hold you accountable, and push you to higher levels of success, then keep reading.
1. Define Your Values
Think of connecting with others like going to the grocery store. When you go to the store with a list, it’s quick and easy. But, if you don’t have a list, it can be frustrating, time-consuming, and you may walk out feeling like you never want to do it again. What this example points out is that clarity is key. One of the reasons so many people get frustrated with traditional
networking or connecting, in general, is because they feel like it’s not bearing fruit. They spend all this time meeting people but don’t really connect with them. Well, part of the reason they run into this issue is that it's not yet exactly clear for them who they’d like to connect with. And more importantly, they haven’t done so from a value perspective. There’s nothing worse than getting into a friendship or relationship with someone, only to find out later that the two of you don’t value the same things. That can often signal trouble for the relationship because we often avoid being around people who have different values than us. That’s why Jim Rohn famously said, “you become the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” It’s critical to define your core values because they are the things that are most important to you. If you want to connect with like-minded people, you have to know what would make them like-minded or not. But to do that, you must define your values first.
2. Create a Plan
Call me crazy, but I’m a sucker for a good plan. The assurance that comes with knowing that you’ve got a process or map in place helps to alleviate the stress that can come with not knowing what to do. Because, for many, not knowing what to do, or where to start, is a big hurdle to overcome when it comes to connection. Once you’ve gotten clarity on exactly who you want to connect with, based on your core values, the next step is to create a plan. This will be your roadmap of sorts - it’ll ensure that you’re on track and doing the right things according to your goals. A few things to keep in mind when it comes to creating your connection plan are:
- Determine where your like-minded people hang out.
- Decide which means of connection resonate with you.
- Figure out how much time you want to dedicate to connecting with them.
Where Are They Hanging Out?
An essential component of connecting with people you want is knowing where to find them. For example, if you’re someone who values being a family person, you’re not likely to find your tribe of people at a bar or club frequented by singles. Get clear on where the people you want to connect with are hanging out, so you can then determine which places you want to meet them in.
How Are You Going to Connect?
Once you’ve determined where your like-minded people are hanging out, you then have to decide how and where you’re going to engage with them. Chances are, there are going to be multiple ways you can connect (i.e. in-person networking events, seminars/live events, mastermind groups, other online forums, etc.), so you can determine which one best suits you. If you’re an introvert by nature and want to ease into connecting with people, then starting online through groups and forums may be right up your alley. On the other hand, if you’re looking for that in-person connection around a shared passion, live events and seminars are great options. And if you’re a total extrovert and want to connect with people in your local area, networking events are a possibility. The key is to pick the options that you think will allow you to be comfortable so that you can genuinely connect with people.
How Much Time Will You Spend?
The last thing you want to determine when creating your connection plan is how much time you want to dedicate to it. Are you going to try to attend a live event a month? Perhaps you have to be present and engage for an hour in some online group. Regardless, connecting with like-minded people is just like anything else you want to be successful at - it requires action. If you’re serious about really attracting people who inspire you and will allow you to transform your life, then you can’t leave it up to chance. Figure out how much time you want to dedicate to this, and stick to it.
3. Put Yourself Out There
The last step to attracting and connecting with like-minded people is to put yourself out there. We have this innate
fear of judgment, and we hold ourselves back in so many ways from living the life that we desire. But in the words of Bruce Lee, “courage is not the absence of fear, it is the ability to act in the presence of fear.” For most people, just the thought of connecting with strangers and potentially being judged is enough to stop them in their tracks. But you have to be willing to push forward despite that fear. Having connections is essential to a quality life, and it can be transformative to your success. But you have to be willing to face the fear and do it. Once you’ve done connection tip two, and have created your plan, stick to it. Treat it like it’s a contract that has a stiff penalty if you break it. In fact, you can even come up with some penalties of your own to ensure that you stick to it. For example, a friend of mine, who is a huge New York Giants football fan, wrote a check for an uncomfortable sum of money to the Dallas Cowboys - the arch-rivals of his beloved team. He then gave his best friend permission to mail that check if he didn’t follow through on building his business. Accountability works wonders when it comes to creating a result. So, if you’re serious about wanting to attract and connect with like-minded people who inspire you, consider creating an accountability system of your own. Either way, you have to be willing to get out there and actually connect in order to attract the right people.
You Can Attract Like-Minded People
Making connections can be intimidating if you allow it to be. But, if you do the things I’ve outlined above, it will be a lot easier to do without all of the potential fear and overwhelm. Remember, start by getting clear on who you want to connect with and attract based on your core values. You have to know what you value to know whether someone actually is “like-minded.” Secondly, create a plan for connecting. So much of the overwhelming feeling when attracting the right people into our lives is from not knowing where to start or what to do. But like every other thing you want to be successful at, if you create a connection plan, things will be so much clearer for you. Lastly, you have to take action and put yourself out there. Don’t let the fears of potential judgment or rejection hold you back. If you do those three things, you’ll have no problem attracting and connecting with like-minded people who inspire you.
More Tips to Help You Connect with Others
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